Please, Please Figure It Out Guys

Bball

When I lived in Connecticut, one of the universities recruited a super-tall guy for their basketball team. He was towering, probably over 7 feet, but he didn’t know how to dunk. So someone on the team tried to teach him. The recruit watched another player dunk and then tried to emulate the move. He jogged up to the basket holding a ball and launched into the air. And then used the rim of the net to knock out his upper teeth.

I thought of that after reading recent news accounts about two mid-level politicians. A Senate candidate from New York referred to an African-American reporter as a “dirty ape”. The second guy (a new House member) compared promoting healthcare enrollment numbers to Nazi record-keeping for concentration camps.

I’d love to sit in on the interviews where these guys find their campaign managers (“Well, I’ve spent a decade in trailer park management and now I’m looking to get into campaign management”).

These politicians are the bench for the Republican team. Many are gunning for the pros, and a few will even get there. And I’ve come to the following conclusion:

What we’re witnessing today with the GOP is just like watching a college basketball game. It’s been a long, heated match, with lots of elbows thrown. It’s now moved into overtime. But all of the good players have fouled out. So the players jogging around the court are mostly white back-benchers who totally suck. Some guy has just scored a dunk and is running triumphantly down the court, clueless to the fact that he put the ball into his own team’s net.

That guy is Mr. Dirty Ape and Mr. Cattle-car.

It’s getting harder every day to not pick up the remote, change the channel, and go see what’s on sale over at The Home Shopping Network. Which isn’t good, regardless of which team you support. The GOP needs to get their real players back in the game, for everyone’s sake.

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4 thoughts on “Please, Please Figure It Out Guys”

  1. On the other hand, the dumber the Republicans become, the easier it will be for us Democrats.

    *ducks and leaves the room*

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