4-year-old: Why am I not in your wedding pictures? Me: You were born 3 years later. 4: *cries because we didn’t invite her*
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 10, 2014
Me: That lady is driving a Jaguar. 4-year-old: That’s not a jaguar. That’s a car. Me: 4: You’re stupid.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 9, 2014
My 2-year-old screamed at me because her ice cream was too cold. I’m a terrible father.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 9, 2014
4-year-old: Can I have a pony? Me: Where would you keep it? 4: In my castle. Me: 4: Can I have a castle?
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 9, 2014
4-year-old: When were the dinosaurs alive? Me: A long, long, long time ago. 4: When you were a baby?
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 9, 2014
From http://t.co/HTDVyr8D7T 3/16/14: pic.twitter.com/UUfE8ymRk4
— James Breakwell (@James_Breakwell) September 1, 2014