Organ transplants are almost commonplace today, but one Italian surgeon is head and shoulders above the rest in his transplant practice—literally. Dr. Sergio Canavero has designed a procedure for complete head transplants which he believes will be viable in two years. Yep, if your body conks out but your head still wants to go on, this surgeon believes that he will soon be able to swap your bad body for a good one and attach your head to it. So how exactly will this work?
Well, first you need a good donor body. I’m not exactly sure what rules exist to selecting a body. The good surgeon didn’t expound upon this. I’m assuming you have to wait for someone to expire, but do you get a choice of the recently expired bodies? Do you put in an order for a specific body type? Will there be an online catalog to process requests? Can you switch genders? Or race? Will they take Paypal?
Let’s assume you have signed up for a transplant and after whatever necessary research is completed, you find your perfect bottom half. How is the transplant accomplished? Well, here’s the procedure…yep, the honest-to-goodness procedure. Don’t try this at home.
Step 1: Place donor body and receiving head into hypothermia state for about 45 minutes to eliminate any damage from a lack of oxygen.
Step 2: Cut the head from the old body with an ultra-sharp knife. (Does this really need to be in the instruction manual? Are there surgeons out there thinking of using a butter knife, paper cutter or maybe a can opener to separate the head from the body?)
Step 3: Fuse the spinal cord of the donor body to the head. Once all attachments are made, the new head/body combo remains in a coma for about a month so that the nerves and muscles have time to fuse together and then Shazam! You have a new head! The miracle of modern medicine.
On another note: Surgeons in South Africa announced they have performed the first successful penis transplant.
Somehow the head transplant doesn’t seem so important anymore.
I read about the recent successful transplant in South Africa … but that article just can’t compare to the post that you have written here! Your idea of paypal is brilliant!
Definitely depends on what you think with . . .
Yes, which part is more important to have working properly!
We now have a solution for all those men who believe they were born in the wrong body. And women as well!
You know, if it helps people find their true identity, I am all for it Maura
Same here. I’m waiting for the next sci-fi step when we’re able to separate the ‘soul’ or ‘consciousness’ from the ‘meat’ and go from body to body.
Bill Y refuses to believe this until we all go to work on hover boards. Show me the hover board and then I’ll swap heads!
I will write to the surgeon and give him your address Bill Y. Maybe he can send the hover board. 🙂
Let’s make sure they don’t mix up those two operations; we have enough dick heads in the world.
Mark, that is the most important point made on this topic EVER!!
Wow this is great news Donna! I could get a new head with perfect hair!!!
Forget it Deb! You have much better hair than me as we have discussed at length and I get first dibs on the best hair heads. 🙂
Leave it to the Italians! 😉
Just one question:
If I put my 69 year old head on a 30 year old body, then get blood rushing through everything as usual, will the young blood rejuvenate the head, or will the head age the body before its time? This is important.
That was my very first question.
I don’t know but maybe it depends upon people’s preferences!
So now they can transplant the head a guy thinks with AND the one on his shoulders too? Scary. If supermodels start getting whacked we’ll know exactly what’s up.
I wonder if there is a way to warn the supermodels Thomas!
Whoa…this is great news. I’ve been saving my money so I can bundle my transplants. I was looking at the “Big abuse body bundle plan” which is a new liver, a lung and the option of either a new heart or unlimited liposuction.
BUT NOW…I can just get the whole body…did you say something about a catalog????
Give Google or Amazon a year, and there will be the best catalog ever!!!!
A mind IS a terrible thing to waste.
Or any other body part for that matter!!