Report: Lamar Odom Awakens, Asks If He Got All Of Sex Acts He Paid For | HumorOutcasts

Report: Lamar Odom Awakens, Asks If He Got All Of Sex Acts He Paid For

October 16, 2015
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LAS VEGAS — A close family source reported that Lamar Odom is conscious and breathing on his own in a Las Vegas hospital and has even spoken a few words, mostly questions about whether he got all of the sex acts he paid for before losing consciousness.

“Seventy five thousand bucks is a lot of dough, man. I’m pretty sure I didn’t get seventy five thousand bucks worth of sex before I started discharging bodily fluids from my eyes and mouth, you know? I know I’m a basketball player and I’ve made millions of dollars, but a guy’s still gotta be frugal about these types of things. I was thinking that 75 Gs was at least gonna last me a few days.”

Odom has been hospitalized since Tuesday, when he was found unconscious at a well-known Nevada brothel, 90 minutes from Las Vegas. He was rushed to the hospital and put on life support. He now wears a breathing mask, which is not quite enough to muffle his incessant questions about the brothel’s return policy.

Eric Hetvile

Wanted in 14 states. But those states suck, anyway.

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2 Responses to Report: Lamar Odom Awakens, Asks If He Got All Of Sex Acts He Paid For

  1. October 16, 2015 at 8:28 pm

    You know, I wouldn’t be surprised if he asked about his money back guarantee or if there is a chance he could have a spin off series about his rehab process.

  2. Kathy Minicozzi
    October 16, 2015 at 8:26 pm

    Well, I guess sometimes you DON’T get what you pay for!



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