Rules of the Road on a Holiday Weekend

As you know the holiday weekend is one where friends and family gather to celebrate and honor those who have served our country.  Unfortunately, in order to celebrate together, most people have to drive to one destination, and this is when trouble occurs.  So, for those going to barbecues or picnics or whatever, here is a list of road rules that should be followed so that we can all be safe on the road .

• It is never allowed to make a left turn from the right lane and/or a right turn from the left lane.  Contrary to popular belief, law enforcement does not suspend this basic rule for any holiday weekend.
• Being stuck behind someone driving 45 MPH in the left lane on any highway is justifiable grounds for road rage.  If you cannot drive over 45 because you are afraid of highways, have the barbecue at your house.
• While it is nice to have one of those suction cup American flags on your car to show your patriotism, it is not nice if your flag loses its suction on the highway and flies into the windshield of the guy behind you, especially if that car is being driven by a state trooper.
• Don’t have stupid people bring your fireworks. Sure, it’s tempting to have your cousin, Three-fingers Theo, spring for the TNT, but remember he is on the road with a lot of innocent people and nothing good can come from taking this risk.

And finally…

• Never drive alone if you are bringing the American Flag Jell-O mold. It only takes one hard brake for disaster to strike. More innocent molds have lost their lives sitting in the passenger seat unattended than most of us can imagine.