9 Tell tale signs of ‘workopause’

There comes a time in your life when you have paid off the mortgage, the kids are grown and you realize your career quads are too weak to climb the corporate ladder. You start to daydream about what life would be like if you did the unthinkable.

Retire.

Unless you’ve been unjustly kicked to the curb by your employer, retiring is a process not an event, similar to menopause. I like to call it ‘workopause.’

How do you know when you are in this life stage?

  1. When someone asks when you plan to retire, you stop looking over your shoulder to see who they are talking to.
  2. You have mood swings that start on Sunday night and resolve on Friday afternoon at about 5:00.
  3. You fantasize about your perfect retired self, the one who has time for workouts, journaling, and carb balancing.
  4. You think about jeans and wonder what it would be like to wear them on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. Maybe you will dress in business casual on Friday just to turn the world upside down.
  5. You fancy writing more blog posts since you are a morning person, and most of your crazy ideas come to you in the hour you are racing around getting ready for work.
  6. You visualize yourself mesmerizing guests at a cocktail party, describing the antics of Ellen’s latest guest star.
  7. You have a week off and you are strangely drawn to shop on Tuesday. Spooky! You didn’t even know it was senior discount day.
  8. You start splitting restaurant meals with your spouse just for practice.
  9. Not only do you start reading the AARP magazine, you find the articles fascinating.

Do you recognize these or any other ‘workopause’ signs in your life or the life of a loved one?

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8 thoughts on “9 Tell tale signs of ‘workopause’”

  1. I think it’s called Menopause because that’s when we women are putting the pause on our men…in other news, creating your own life is pretty sweet, if you don’t work for yourself ( I do and my boss can be such a bitch). Every day you get closer to nirvana, Molly!

  2. And then there’s the sleeplessness, when you awaken at 3:00 a.m. stressing about work deadlines, and imagine what it would be like to have none (thereby lulling yourself back to sleep). Oh, and in the absence of ovarian eggs, you compulsively check the status of your retirement nest egg to make sure it’s still viable…

    1. These are definitely signs that you are in the throes of ‘workopause,’ Roxanne. I’m looking forward to throwing work stress to the curb and nurturing those hatched nest eggs!

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