Blog Archives

Throwback Thursdays: Scott Walker Glows On Cosmo Cover

February 11, 2016
By

MADISON, WI — Republican presidential hopeful Scott Walker graced the cover of Cosmopolitan magazine in June 2015 to respond to criticism of his silence on same sex marriage. Walker, who appears in drag on the…

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Michigan dog law makes orgasms an illegal felony

February 9, 2016
By

Normally I would be satirizing the fact that Michigan is determined to throw 99.9% of its population into jail for sexual exploration. Sadly, the truth is stranger than any fiction I can come up with.…

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After failed presidential run, Rand and Ron Paul announce bid to join The Mamas and The Papas

February 8, 2016
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Cleveland, OH – Father and son duo team Ron and Rand Paul announced at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Saturday their bid to join renowned classic rock group The Mamas and The Papas.…

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SmartAss Sundays: Playing Family Feud

February 7, 2016
By

Family Feud is like going to Vegas with a bad gambling addiction. The odds are never in your favor. Some invisible man we never see goes and asks 100 people out of 350 million Americans…

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What is really going on in the American political spectrum?

February 6, 2016
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Never in all my days have I seen such low brow, common denominator entertainment in my life. This makes wrestling look legitimate and we all know its staged. Every day now there is some nominee…

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Uber Driver Pepper Sprays Passenger After Flatulence Episode In The Car

February 5, 2016
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TALAHASEE, FL – An Uber driver pepper sprayed a passenger in his vehicle during a violent flatulence incident late Saturday night that began with too much inexpensive draft specials, sliders, and bottom shelf liquor from…

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Fiorina goes after condom companies; claims ‘This is not rubber’

February 4, 2016
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LINCOLN, NE — After making Planned Parenthood the centerpiece of her 2016 campaign, in spite of a multitude of reports that the videos used as the basis of her argument are erroneous, Republican presidential hopeful…

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Jeb Bush Accepts Hennessy Endorsement, Appeals With Young Black Voters

February 3, 2016
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MIAMI, FL — Black History Month brings out the best in politician voter relations.  Just yesterday Republican presidential nominee hopeful Jeb Bush became the newest brand ambassador for Hennessy liquors to kick off positive race…

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Betty White – I Lost My Lesbian Virginity To Margaret Thatcher

February 2, 2016
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CLEVELAND, OH — Actress Betty White shocked audiences at a gay pride rally in Cleveland yesterday when she announced she lost her lesbian virginity to former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher. The Hot in Cleveland…

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Boob Rash: A Silent Disease that only killed women until fat men got it

February 1, 2016
By

Every year in the United States women are ignored for any health related afflictions that can be chalked up to ‘womanly problems’. Outside confirmed cases of breast or reproductive cancer, anything that doesn’t require anesthesia…

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