If we’ve learned one thing from the Republican debates—other than the fact that Republicans are retarded—it’s that Barack Obama is a religion-hating baby killer. And with all the hubbub over the president’s “war on religion,”…
After more than 200 published articles with YAHOO! Contributor Network (formerly Associated Content), I received my first rejection from them because “Commentary… should be thoughtful and measured [and] should make clear distinctions between opinion and…
Yes they are. I’d suspected something wasn’t quite right with these people about the time the late Reverend Jerry Falwell began a crusade to take down that infamous public television promoter of the gay agenda,…
After a long hiatus (Latin for “drug and alcohol rehab”), I have returned to bring you this year’s edition of my favorite subject: sex scandals. And if the sex scandals of 2011 taught us anything,…
Prepare to Have Your Nizzle Shizzled, Bro! Having grown up on the mean streets of white suburbia, I have always kind of been a little on the edge which has kept me in tune with…
Pretty boys like Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez get to screw all the hot chicks. Ugly boys like the guys listed below get screwed in print by heartless bastards like me. Don Mossi Back in…
In defense of Anthony Weiner, going on Twitter and tweeting his penis to young women sounds a whole lot dirtier than it really is. Hell, it’s not like he was poking them on Facebook. It…
Being a man who has made a meager living writing revisionist history in my award-winning American History series—a series no less an authority than my wife refers to as “that stupid shit you write”—I know…
After a long hiatus—which is Latin for “rehab”—I have returned to bring you more great stuff on even more great stuff. Before you start judging me about the whole rehab thing, please know that I…
We all like lists and we particularly enjoy lists that contain ten items. This undoubtedly comes from the fact that we humans have ten fingers, thus allowing us to easily keep track of ten items.…
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