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	<title>HumorOutcasts &#187; Richard Spall</title>
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	<link>http://humoroutcasts.com</link>
	<description>The Place to Take a Humor Break</description>
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		<title>Happy Mothers&#8217; Day</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/happy-mothers-day/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/happy-mothers-day/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 12 May 2013 13:12:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Fiction]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=32958</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Today is the the day we celebrate happy mothers. There are not many of them out there, due to all the stuff they have to put up with from children and husbands. And that, I think, is why they need their own special day. Today, we salute the few, the proud&#8230; the happy mothers. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/happy-mothers-day/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Empowered By Courage of Jason Collins, 3 NBA Players Come Out As White</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/empowered-by-courage-of-jason-collins-3-nba-players-come-out-as-white/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/empowered-by-courage-of-jason-collins-3-nba-players-come-out-as-white/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 01 May 2013 03:18:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dirk Nowitzki]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[first]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[homosexual]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jason Collins]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry Bird]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[NBA]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=32520</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Empowered by NBA player Jason Collins&#8217; courageous announcement that he is a gay man, 3 more NBA players came forward, this time to announce that they are white. Retired NBA great Larry Bird as well as current players Dirk Nowitzki of the Dallas Mavericks and Chris Andersen of the Miami Heat all came forward and announced their whiteness. Bird suggested that he thought many of his teammates had long suspected he was white, but he did not want to make any announcement while he was playing because he felt it might reflect poorly on his team, the Boston Celtics. He says that the hardest part was hiding his Air Supply tapes when traveling on the team bus back in the 1980&#8242;s. Dirk Nowitzki explained that since he&#8217;s German, he felt that it was probably obvious, but when a teammate recently called him a &#8220;brother&#8221;, he thought there may have been a misunderstanding. Things were cleared up pretty quickly in the team locker room, though he was unable to explain his love for David Hasselhoff. Chris &#8220;Birdman&#8221; Andersen may have had the most difficult struggle. &#8220;Everyone knows that it&#8217;s not popular to be white in the NBA. But I swear this [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/empowered-by-courage-of-jason-collins-3-nba-players-come-out-as-white/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
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		<item>
		<title>The Trouble With Rats (Part 2)</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-trouble-with-rats-part-2/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-trouble-with-rats-part-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 18 Mar 2013 21:12:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Everyday Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lifestyle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Death]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humane society]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[killing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[peanut butter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ratricide]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[the trouble with rats]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[traps]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=30767</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It had been about a week since I had consulted with a professional, scrapped my soy butter, and laid down the forbidden peanut butter snacks-of-death for my uninvited guest rats. So I donned some latex gloves, some safety goggles, and a face mask so that I would not pass out from the scores of sure to be decomposing dead rats assuredly awaiting my visit to the attic. I also brought a large kitchen bag in the hopes that it was strong enough to hold all of the products of ratricide. The box that the trap came in did indeed include a procedure for releasing the rat and reusing the trap, but that was not going to happen. It seemed that a week was a bit long, as there were only 5 traps in there, and once 5 rats were nabbed, I doubted that the others would wait in line for their turn for very long before finally giving up. So I whipped open the attic door, bracing myself for the inevitable stench of death that awaited me. Hmm. Nothing. A bit like peanut butter, if anything. So I turned on the light and began to scan the traps. Empty. And [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-trouble-with-rats-part-2/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Trouble With Rats (Part 1)</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-trouble-with-rats-part-1/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-trouble-with-rats-part-1/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Mar 2013 22:01:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Everyday Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[attic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[filthy bastards]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[flashing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pest control]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rats]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rodents]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[scratching]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[squirrels]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[traps]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=30614</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[My wife alerted me to the fact that there was scratching and clawing going on in our ceiling. And she said there&#8217;s small amounts of crap being laid down in the attic on the rubbermaid tubs of stuff. And then she said there&#8217;s even more scratching and clawing. And she said they were dropping things. And she said they were dragging things. The noise was driving me nuts. And whoever was in the attic is making a ton of noise, too! I bought some metal flashing and blocked off one spot under the eaves where it looked like a starving animal might be able to squeeze, and I put some traps out in the lower attic, but we still heard lots of noise up there and found no dead rats in the traps. I had put out a poison bait tray a year or so ago and it was ignored then but now completely empty, with an accompanying thank you note asking politely for more bait. &#8220;Especially the green ones!&#8221; One night, I could have sworn I heard music up there. So finally I called in the professionals. Certainly they&#8217;ve got some trick up their sleeve. I didn&#8217;t know who [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-trouble-with-rats-part-1/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
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		<title>Intense Speculation Mounts Over Pope Selection Process</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/intense-speculation-mounts-over-pope-selection-process/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/intense-speculation-mounts-over-pope-selection-process/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 13 Mar 2013 19:19:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Lifestyle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Religion or Lack Of]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Benedict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fight club]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jorge Mario Bergoglio]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new pope]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=30530</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The telltale white smoke from the Sistine Chapel has indicated that the Roman Catholic Church has a new pope. The successor to Pope Benedict XVI has been chosen and now it has been announced that Argentina&#8217;s Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio will soon be named the new pope. The attending cardinals have historically been sworn to secrecy, leaving many to only guess how exactly they determine the winner. Stirring speeches, political maneuvering, or biblical trivia contests have all been suggested as possibilities. But careful observers, now armed with a bevy of archived photos from earlier papal selections have been beginning to notice a pattern. New pope Cardinal Bergoglio has now emerged with what looks like a black eye, a cut across his forehead, and possibly a limp on his right side. Previous footage of Pope Benedict XVI&#8217;s selection in 2005 showed him with a swollen jaw and a cut on his cheek. And even earlier photos of Pope John Paul II appeared to show stitches about his right eye and a cut on his lower lip. At the conclusion of the two most recent conclaves, there were unconfirmed reports of ambulances coming to and from the back of the Sistine Chapel, [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/intense-speculation-mounts-over-pope-selection-process/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
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		<title>Rookie Vatican Fireman Causes $2 Million In Damages Dousing Sistine Chapel Smoke</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/rookie-vatican-fireman-causes-2-million-in-damages-dousing-sistine-chapel-smoke/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/rookie-vatican-fireman-causes-2-million-in-damages-dousing-sistine-chapel-smoke/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 12 Mar 2013 20:39:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Fiction]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=30494</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A rookie Vatican firefighter, Giuseppe Vanotti, caused $2 million in damages to the Sistine Chapel earlier today when he mistook the black smoke billowing from the historic church during the papal conclave to be an out of control fire. &#8220;I&#8217;m a sorry&#8230; I didn&#8217;t know,&#8221; said Vanotti, &#8220;I just a started last week. But I see a the smoke and I say &#8216;Hey, there&#8217;s a smoke!&#8217; so I get a my hose. I was just a trying to help.&#8221; Ruined by the water damage from the errant hose were several dozen robes, 3 flat screen TVs, a high tech whole church audio system, and 400 cases of Eucharist wafers, which are now way too soggy to serve. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/rookie-vatican-fireman-causes-2-million-in-damages-dousing-sistine-chapel-smoke/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
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		<title>God Chooses New Pope In Most Dramatic Rose Ceremony Ever</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/god-chooses-new-pope-in-most-dramatic-rose-ceremony-ever/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/god-chooses-new-pope-in-most-dramatic-rose-ceremony-ever/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 11 Mar 2013 16:25:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Good Clean Fun]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Benedict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Papal conclave]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pope]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=30432</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Word has leaked that God has chosen the next pope. After much pontiff-icating he selected the Victor, whom we are told may not have been the most pope-u-lar choice. Tabloids have been speculating over whether this choice was going to lean toward the pastor future. But once he made up his mind, he proposed immediately, as he really didn&#8217;t want to Lucius one before he used up Paul of his roses. It has long been the cardinal sin for God to express his feelings to a prospective pope until the final rose ceremony, and by rule cameras are prohibited from the fantasy suite. Though screams of &#8220;Oh God!&#8221; could be plainly heard out in the hallways while they were involved in some Celestine activities. Many viewers will be happy with the outcome of a series that seems to have been moving at a Gelasius pace and often has felt like it&#8217;s stuck in wet Clement. Most suspected that producers were attempting to dime and Nicholas to death with commercials. Formosus, the tropical destinations have been much more exciting than the Urban settings, and many were left to wonder &#8220;how long chalice go on?&#8221; Vatican watchers had been expecting him to [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/god-chooses-new-pope-in-most-dramatic-rose-ceremony-ever/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
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		<title>First Gas Upgrade</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/first-gas-upgrade/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/first-gas-upgrade/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 09 Mar 2013 00:01:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Everyday Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lifestyle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[airlines]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[first class]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[flatulence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[flying]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ideal gas law]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[manners]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[offend]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=30338</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I was recently directed to this hard-hitting news piece regarding flatulence on airlines. Flying increases flatulence, according to an article published Friday in the peer-reviewed New Zealand Medical Journal, and passengers should release the gas &#8212; or risk painful medical consequences. It&#8217;s simple. When altitude increases, pressure decreases. According to the thermodynamic principal known as the &#8220;ideal gas law,&#8221; as pressure drops, volume increases. While cabins are pressurized to compensate, the mechanisms can only do so much. When the plane is at a cruising altitude of 33,000 feet, inside it&#8217;s still the equivalent of 8,000 feet above sea level. That&#8217;s a lot of physics bearing down on your intestines. So next time you&#8217;re on an airline flight and can&#8217;t help yourself, don&#8217;t be ashamed. Just shrug your shoulders and say, &#8220;Can&#8217;t fight the ideal gas law.&#8221; Even if the gas is less than ideal. Perhaps we should all wait until the captain has illuminated the lamp which indicates that it is safe to equalize your pressure. Unfortunately, no graceful phrase or gesture exists to completely smooth over the social awkwardness of releasing your personal flatulence inside a confined space where 50 percent of the air is recirculated. An &#8220;excuse me&#8221; [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/first-gas-upgrade/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
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		<title>Trying a New Restaurant</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/trying-a-new-restaurant/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/trying-a-new-restaurant/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 05:37:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=30150</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A little bit nervous trying out a new neighborhood restaurant. It&#8217;s way too early for the health department to have been by already to say &#8216;yay&#8217; or &#8216;neigh&#8217; on the burgers. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/trying-a-new-restaurant/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
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		<title>These Kids Today&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/these-kids-today/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/these-kids-today/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 19 Feb 2013 18:05:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[children]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kids]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[manners]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[today]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=29544</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I was out in public the other day and a pair of kids were acting out of control and annoying me. So I went and had some choice words with their mother. I said &#8220;Listen lady, these kids are running around, loud and obnoxious&#8230; You need to do something about this.&#8221; She said, &#8220;HEY, THEY&#8217;RE YOUR KIDS, TOO!&#8221; Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/these-kids-today/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
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		<title>Exor-Sis</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/exor-sis/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/exor-sis/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Feb 2013 13:30:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lifestyle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Movies & TV]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[books]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[demonic possession]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Devil]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Exorcist]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[movies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[possessionion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teenage girls]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=29333</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Often a movie made from a novel will change significant details of plot and characters to make it more acceptable to movie audiences. I have been told by someone who read the book, &#8220;The Exorcist&#8221;, that in the book, there was actually no demonic possession of the teenage girl. That&#8217;s just how girls of that age generally behave and they didn&#8217;t want the movie to be too scary. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/exor-sis/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
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		<title>Going to Jared</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/going-to-jared/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/going-to-jared/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 14 Feb 2013 16:01:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Everyday Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lifestyle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=29336</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This Valentine&#8217;s Day, I&#8217;m going to Jared. The meatball sub and Doritos combo is going to make someone a very happy lady. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/going-to-jared/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
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		<title>Passport</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/passport/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/passport/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 14 Feb 2013 15:11:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Everyday Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lifestyle]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=29331</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[My wife was dismayed this morning that I was going to get my passport photo without shaving first. But what&#8217;s the point of having a semi-permanent depiction of a beauty standard I can&#8217;t possibly hope to live up to? Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/passport/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
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		<title>The Paradox of Raising Children</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-paradox-of-raising-children/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-paradox-of-raising-children/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 14 Feb 2013 15:09:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Everyday Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lifestyle]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=29329</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The paradox of raising children is that often you have to make them do things for themselves in order to prepare them for life, but the problem is that they stink at pretty much everything. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-paradox-of-raising-children/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
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		<title>IOC Drops Wrestling from Olympics, Adds Rhythmic Wrestling</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/ioc-drops-wrestling-from-olympics-adds-rhythmic-wrestling/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/ioc-drops-wrestling-from-olympics-adds-rhythmic-wrestling/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 12 Feb 2013 21:28:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lifestyle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[freestyle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[greco-roman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gymnastics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ioc]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[olympics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rhythmic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wrestling]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=29216</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[International Olympic Committee leaders dropped Wrestling from the Olympic program on Tuesday. This was a decision that shocked many and eliminates one of the oldest Olympic sports from the 2020 Games. However, the anger of many wrestling purists may be alleviated by the fact that in the vacancy created by the removal of Greco-Roman and Freestyle Wrestling, the IOC has agreed to insert a new event, Rhythmic Wrestling. Rhythmic Wrestling does not involve any sort of grappling techniques such as throws, takedowns, joint locks, or pins. It requires very little strength or technique and does not in any way resemble any sort of historical hand to hand conflict that you might expect to see exhibited in traditional wrestling. It is said to combine the excitement of equestrian dressage with the artistry of table tennis. No one but the participants really understands the sport, but it has something to do with a ball, a rope, and a long striped ribbon. The white knuckle excitement of Rhythmic Wrestling begins in summer 2020. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
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		<title>American Psychiatric Association: You Can&#8217;t Tell Who Is Crazy Just By Looking At Them</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/american-psychiatric-association-says-you-cant-tell-who-is-crazy-just-by-looking-at-them/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/american-psychiatric-association-says-you-cant-tell-who-is-crazy-just-by-looking-at-them/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 12 Feb 2013 19:39:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[american psychiatric association]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[crazy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Michele Bachmann]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=29191</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[After a lengthy multi-year study, the American Psychiatric Association has declared that you cannot tell who is crazy just by looking at them. They say that there is absolutely no correlation between looking crazy and being crazy, and that any such alignment would purely be coincidence. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/american-psychiatric-association-says-you-cant-tell-who-is-crazy-just-by-looking-at-them/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The  Boy Scouts Controversy</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-boy-scouts-controversy/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-boy-scouts-controversy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 09 Feb 2013 15:52:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[controversy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gay boy scouts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[scouts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[troops]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[uniforms]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=29088</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Apparently, there&#8217;s some kind of uproar about whether the Boy Scouts should let gay people be scouts. I just want to say that you shouldn&#8217;t make fun of people who seem kind of strange, wear silly clothes, and spend a lot of time sleeping with their same sex peers. You should also not make fun of gay people. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/the-boy-scouts-controversy/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>30 Million People Tune into Oprah-Lance Armstrong Interview Minutes After Discovering They Actually Get OWNTV in Their Channel Lineup</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/30-million-people-tune-into-oprah-lance-armstrong-interview-minutes-after-discovering-they-actually-get-owntv-in-their-channel-lineup/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/30-million-people-tune-into-oprah-lance-armstrong-interview-minutes-after-discovering-they-actually-get-owntv-in-their-channel-lineup/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 18 Jan 2013 22:43:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Movies & TV]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[doping]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[interview]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lance Armstrong]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lying]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Oprah Winfrey]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[OWN]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[OWNTV]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[scandal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tour de France]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=28055</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Thirty million people across America tuned in to watch Thursday evening&#8217;s well-hyped interview of disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong by Oprah Winfrey, practically all of them shortly after discovering that they actually received OWNTV and that it was indeed Oprah&#8217;s cable network. &#8220;How long have I had this? Are you telling me I&#8217;ve been missing these Dr. Phil reruns all this time?&#8221; asked Beverly Mattson of Indianapolis, Indiana. &#8220;I saw that before, but I thought it was a shopping network. She should have put her name on the network or something so it would be more obvious,&#8221; said Betty Holliday of Carson City, Nevada. &#8220;Are you sure it isn&#8217;t?&#8221; added her sister Molly. &#8220;I am pretty sure I bought a snuggie and some colon cleanse off of there.&#8221; &#8220;I thought Oprah retired. What the hell is this?&#8221; asked self-described Oprah fanatic Terry Yates. Early results are indicating that it was a ratings smash. The 30 million viewers are an increase of 1.3 million percent over the average Thursday evening OWNTV viewer total of 23 people. The two-part 2.5 hour production is expected to pull in a record advertising haul after successfully selling out all 130 minutes of ad time. The 90 [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/30-million-people-tune-into-oprah-lance-armstrong-interview-minutes-after-discovering-they-actually-get-owntv-in-their-channel-lineup/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Fix for Phone Dropped in Toilet</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/fix-for-phone-dropped-in-toilet/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/fix-for-phone-dropped-in-toilet/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 02 Jan 2013 23:11:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=27357</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I dropped my phone in my toilet and immediately put it in a bowl of rice like everyone says on the internet. Didn&#8217;t work. Phone still doesn&#8217;t work and the rice tasted awful. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2013/fix-for-phone-dropped-in-toilet/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Red Ribbon Week</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/red-ribbon-week/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/red-ribbon-week/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 01 Oct 2012 17:49:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[addict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[addiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[alcohol]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[drugs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[drunk]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[red ribbon week]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=23745</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Every year at my kids&#8217; school, they have &#8220;Red Ribbon Week&#8221;. It&#8217;s a big event for drug and alcohol abuse awareness. Each day of the week, the kids do a particular thing based on the theme for that day. One day is &#8220;wear sweatpants to school&#8221; day. Another is &#8220;go to school with crazy hair&#8221;. And still another is &#8220;go to school in your pajamas&#8221;. I&#8217;m not sure that this has been completely thought out so well, though, since these are the sorts of things a drunk or addict might do. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/red-ribbon-week/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Ho-key Tradition</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/ho-key-tradition/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/ho-key-tradition/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 26 Sep 2012 20:02:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Football]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fear]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hokies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[key play]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[third down]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tradition]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Virginia Tech]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=23538</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[American universities which play college football have a long list of notable traditions. The Oklahoma Sooners have a chuckwagon that races across the field after every score. Florida State has a fake Native American chief come out and shed a tear every time someone drops a piece of trash in the stadium. Texas Longhorn fans make finger puppets with their hands. Stanford has a band whose tuba player occasionally attempts to make tackles on the playing field. Auburn has two mascots because&#8230;well&#8230;I don&#8217;t know why they have two mascots. My alma mater, Virginia Tech, has a few traditions as well. One such tradition dictates what we as fans should do when the opposing team faces third down. Such a third down is designated as a &#8220;key play&#8221;. I don&#8217;t believe the tradition originated at Virginia Tech, but at this time there is no one willing to come forward and take credit for it. Anyway, at this &#8220;key&#8221; time in the game, the crowd is encouraged to take their keys (&#8220;keys&#8221;, see?) out of their pockets and shake them to scare the other team into submission. Because there is nothing&#8230;and I mean nothing&#8230; that strikes bloodcurdling terror into the hearts of [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/ho-key-tradition/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Outside the Box</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/outside-the-box/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/outside-the-box/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 19 Sep 2012 21:47:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[al-qaeda]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Barack Obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitt romney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Osama Bin Laden]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rush limbaugh]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=23204</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rush Limbaugh said that Al-Qaeda gave up Osama bin Laden in order to help Barack Obama politically. And now it&#8217;s even worse than we thought, because it appears that their evil plot has apparently extended to making Mitt Romney throw the election as well. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/outside-the-box/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>I LOVE MY WIFE!</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/i-love-my-wife/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/i-love-my-wife/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 19 Sep 2012 21:39:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[minivan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wife]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=23202</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This morning I saw a guy with a bumper sticker that said, &#8220;I LOVE MY WIFE!&#8221; &#8230; most likely placed there by her in order to mark him as unavailable and keep the prying eyes of the ladies at bay. Though I think this may be a bit redundant on a minivan. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/i-love-my-wife/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Come Together</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/come-together/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/come-together/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 15 Sep 2012 03:04:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Daily Musings / Joke of The Day]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[democrat]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[partisan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[presidential]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[republican]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Romney]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=23030</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It&#8217;s election season again and the country seems more divided than ever. Although it&#8217;s easy to be drawn into partisan bickering, we really must strive to stay above all of the nastiness. After all, we have the same hopes. We have the same dreams. We all want the same things for our children. We&#8217;re all Americans. So please take the high road and continue showing the utmost respect and courtesy to your fellow citizens. Especially those idiots who are going to vote for that prick Mitt Romney. Richard SpallMore Posts - Website - Twitter]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/come-together/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Bad Influence</title>
		<link>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/bad-influence/</link>
		<comments>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/bad-influence/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 15 Sep 2012 02:53:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Richard Spall</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Everyday Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Football]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[NFL]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[picks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pool]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[spread]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://humoroutcasts.com/?p=23028</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I have been in an NFL football pool for about 15 years or so with some guys from the company where I used to work. It&#8217;s the kind of thing where you kick in a small amount at the beginning, you pick games against the spread each week, and win by winning the week or the overall season. My son turned 10 earlier this year and likes football, so after clearing it with the wife (who thought it was a terrible idea), I allowed him to join the pool. I told him that I would cover his entry and he could keep anything won above that. He was really cautious the first week and said he needed my help. He ended up mirroring my picks except for two games. He ended up winning both games, coincidentally, so he&#8217;s now up on me by 2 games. This week, he asked for help again. So we sat down to look at the Thursday matchup and at least get his pick for that game submitted before the deadline. Bears (+6) at Packers I had already made my picks (you can change each of them all the way up to kickoff), but couldn&#8217;t remember [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://humoroutcasts.com/2012/bad-influence/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
		</item>
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