National Holidays Got You Down? Eat Pez and Drink

Bah, Humbug! Another long holiday weekend looms on the horizon. Didn’t we just have one? Personally, I think they should be spaced much farther apart as once again the pressure to grill or be invited to a barbecue mounts. I don’t have a grill or the mental fortitude to buy one when a deadline is involved. It makes me nervous and rashy to be in a rush. I have considered purchasing a small George Foreman model for the kitchen counter but I think size does matter on national holidays. Besides which, even if I had a big snazzy tricked out Weber, I would still need guests to invite over. Is there a “guest” category on Craig’s List? All my friends know they could be blown up or set on fire if I’m cooking. I can’t send out invitations that say “wear fire retardant clothing.”

However, I am a good guest, so if anyone needs an extra at their barbecue I’m available. Although please don’t ask me to bring a “dish.” I never know what that really means – a dish of what? And does preparing one require gingham clothing? Why can’t I just bring a box of Oreos or pass out Pez? On second thought, don’t invite me. I’ll have holiday fun by going to a parade with the dog. He loves marching bands and taking food from small children. I’ll just be happy I’m not home blowing up the deck or setting my friends on fire.

I think it’s best to be alone. I’ll drink bottles of nice crispy Sauvignon Blanc, eat Pez, and read the back issues of “People” that I “borrowed” from my Dentist’s office. Uh oh, he reads my blog…. I promise I’ll bring them back on Tuesday. Happy 4th and call me if you want Pez.

photo by Pixelmama

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One thought on “National Holidays Got You Down? Eat Pez and Drink”

  1. Hey, we’ve got burgers and dogs and all night Netflix if your down Texas’ way. BYOB.

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