Shocking Revelations About Politician | HumorOutcasts

Shocking Revelations About Politician

May 17, 2011

Shocking revelations were revealed about Melvin Dinkledorf, representative of his state’s 8th district. New reports by over 12 different sources have shown that although he has been married for 36 years, he has not ever had an affair with a staffer, a friend’s wife, or even with a bisexual prostitute. He has not had sex in any public bathrooms or even any public libraries. Yes, shocking, but considering the many and varied sources, it appears to be true… and to this reporter… completely lame. Move along boys, nothing to see here.

Though there was that time back in 1986 where a woman wearing a really low cut dress walked by him and he did, in fact, sneak a peek.

Eric Hetvile

Wanted in 14 states. But those states suck, anyway.

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4 Responses to Shocking Revelations About Politician

  1. lbwoodgate
    May 17, 2011 at 4:03 pm

    Melvin Dinkledorf is an android. How else can you explain such a thing?

  2. Jack Sass
    May 17, 2011 at 3:20 pm

    Hmm, a man without vices isn’t to be trusted, ya know?

  3. May 17, 2011 at 12:15 pm

    An honest and decent politician? What is this world coming to?

  4. May 17, 2011 at 12:14 pm

    This must be fiction because this could not have ever happened!

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