To Droid or Not to Droid?

“To Droid or not to Droid that is the question. Whether ’tis nobler in my mind to suffer the slings, arrows, and anxiety attacks of learning new technology or take arms against it and by opposing stick with my antiquated flip phone.” I don’t think Hamlet suffered the way I am now that my AT&T contract is up, and I am free to change carriers and devices. There are too many questions and no fool proof options for a techno-dummy like myself. It took me over a year to learn how to add new contacts to my address book. I still have no idea how to send a text . BTW, the last one I wrote I had to do over six times until it read as English and not Jabberwocky. I tried to take a picture of my Yellow Lab”Beefy Boy” but ended up with a photo of my arm . Does it sound like I am prepared for more advanced technology?

“To sleep perchance to dream of using the iPhone: ay there’s the rub.” Although the “rub” is really the touch pad. I tried one and almost needed to go back into therapy. It took me 45 minutes to spell Gail and not Hbjm. I think all those apps sure sound like fun but I hate games , don’t mind asking for directions and like the Yellow Pages. Just as an experiment in terror, I wandered into my local Verizon store to look at all the slick little phones. Poor cute Brian waited on me. He was very patient and told me the story of how his Grandmother is technologically impaired also. “Do you think I’m old enough to be your Nana?” I shrieked. I burst into tears and said if there was a “Botox” app, I’d take the phone. I left the store empty handed and hightailed it home to search for a plastic surgeon in the Yellow Pages.

A friend of mine told me he likes his Droid X so much that if he could have sex with it, his life would be complete. This made me laugh and then ponder…is there an app for that?

photo by Rosen