Debunking Myths About New York

We New Yorkers and our city have gotten a bum rap over the years. Everybody thinks we are worse than we are. Even New Yorkers think that other New Yorkers are worse than they are. Well, I am here to smash those myths one at a time.

Myth No. 1: New Yorkers are rude

We are not rude. We even say “excuse me” when elbowing our way past you because you aren’t moving fast enough. We say it loud, in case you wouldn’t hear us otherwise and would just stand there like fat lumps. And when we finally get past you, we usually mutter our obscenities softly, so you won’t get upset and try to hurt us.

Myth No. 2: New Yorkers are always in a hurry

This is absolutely false. We are not always in a hurry. Like everyone else in the world, we are only in a hurry when we have to get somewhere we want to go within a certain time. There are many times when New Yorkers are not in a hurry, such as: (1) Saturday mornings, when we are sleeping late; (2) at the head of a checkout counter anywhere; (3) when boarding subway trains, especially if we feel like parking ourselves right inside the door. So, you see, we are not always in a hurry. One more myth bites the dust.

Myth No. 3: New York cabbies drive like maniacs

Okay, well … this one is true, so it doesn’t count. Just check out lirr schedule so you don’t have to use cabs.

Myth No. 4: New York is noisy and dirty

Well, what do you expect? Eight million people live here, and a whole bunch of other people are visiting all the time. Do you really expect them to stay inside and whisper to each other? Sheeeesshh! What’s a little noise, anyway? By the time you’re middle-aged, you’ll probably be suffering from nerve deafness, anyway, and you won’t even notice it. As for the dirt — we have to keep our city sanitation and Parks Department employees employed. If there is no litter for them to pick up, they might lose their jobs. We are too socially responsible for that.

Myth No. 5: New Yorkers talk funny

To a native New Yorker, everybody else talks funny. Actually, there are all kinds of accents in this city, so you quickly get used to hearing everything and you don’t pay too much attention unless you are having trouble understanding someone, like Japanese tourists or people from Minnesota.

Myth No. 6: New York is Crime Central

Whoever says this has been watching too much television. We don’t mind, because we watch those same shows ourselves, and we ourselves are always surprised when we find out that our city does not rank No. 1 in violent crime among big cities in the U.S. In fact, we rank 259^th out of 385. According to those statistics, it’s safer to live in New York City than in Gary, Indiana or Boise, Idaho. If you don’t believe me, just look here: http://www.cqpress.com/pages/citycrime2008 . Our city is not going to lose its reputation for murder on every street corner, though. A crime drama about the Boise Police Department is never going to attract viewers like Law and Order does. New York will always have to shoulder the burden of entertaining every lover of gritty television shows, along with the bad rap that ensues.

So there you have it. Don’t believe everything people tell you about New Yorkers and the place we call home.