Newt Gingrich’s Advice For Cheating Husbands

Newt’s expert advice for guys who are busted cheating on their wife:

Wife: “Why are you having sex with that woman who is not me?”

You: “This is ridiculous! This is the kind of harassment that makes it difficult for people to find decent spouses!

You: “And that fact that you bring this up right before

__ Christmas

__ New Year’s Eve

__ Valentine’s Day

__ St. Patrick’s Day

__ Easter

__ Memorial Day

__ Fourth of July

__ Halloween

__ Thanksgiving

__ Your Birthday

__ My Birthday

__ Pearl Harbor Day

__ Ramadan

__ Flag Day

__ Yom Kippur

__ Boxing Day

__ Cinco de Mayo

__ Hannukah

__ Arbor Day

__ Kwanzaa

__ Vernal Equinox

__ Winter Solstice

__ Friday


And if your wife is the kind of person who might vote for Newt Gingrich, she might even buy it.

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3 thoughts on “Newt Gingrich’s Advice For Cheating Husbands”

  1. To think I was going to call Newt for some marriage and relationship advice! Maybe I should just call the Duggars instead. I am thoroughly confused by the moral right.

  2. Wife: I’ll get the divorce papers ready. I want to search for a decent spouse myself, and I’m sure not finding him HERE.

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