The Miracle Known as Vodka


Vodka has always made me tipsy especially if it is mixed with a lot of tonic.  However, if it is mixed with Triple Sec and cranberry juice and transforms itself into  a “Cosmopolitan”, it makes me extremely inebriated – or the technical term – blottoed.  I share this information not as a prelude for me going to rehab but because I have learned that despite its reputation as the devil’s drink, vodka has a virtuous side. In fact, according to, vodka possesses many uses none  of which involve me shedding either my inhibitions or my clothes.

Did you know that vodka  is a goo remover? Yes, according to, if you have a sticky label or tag, you can wipe said label with vodka and it will dissolve the glue and make the label peel off.  What the article does not say, because the magazine assumes we don’t need these extra instructions, is that you should never dab vodka on labels which are on any apparel item you plan to wear immediately.  Those who get a whiff might get the wrong impression especially if you are on a job interview or behind the wheel and happen to meet up with a police officer.  A cop is going to investigate which might not get you arrested but it will get you at least a breathalyzer and possibly a cavity search. It’s amazing how one dab of vodka can ruin your day.  Another caveat:, vodka should never be dabbed on the clothing of anyone who has any type of alcohol problem. There are not enough AA meetings in the world to handle the potential number of vodka-label goo related relapses.

Did  you know that vodka is a room deodorizer? The article recommends that you make a solution of one part vodka to one part water and spritz it around the room. It also claims that the room will not smell like a cheap Vegas motel for hookers.  Well, those are my words, not theirs,  but the imagery is colorful, right?  I am going to try this unique air freshener.  With two dogs, I am always spraying my rooms or lighting candles  or finding some way to ward off offensive canine odors.  This wasn’t stated in the article but perhaps it’s best NOT to spritz the alcohol in the room at the same time you light the candles. This might be a safety hazard.  I sort of wish the vodka air freshener would make my residence smell like a whore house as I think it might be a deterrent to salespeople and of course, the Jehovah Witnesses  who stop by weekly to save my soul.

Did you know that vodka is a shower cleaner? Yes, you can spritz your shower, tub, curtain and liner with vodka  to prevent mold and other icky things from growing.  I have not tried this yet, but I would think this is a fun way to start one’s day.  Again, as with previous warnings, do not leave the vodka spritzer within easy reach of children, the elderly, or those with addiction issues. However, a little spritzer in the shower between two consulting adults might make a somewhat boring shower into a very romantic  experience.

One last note: I am unsure if it is just vodka that is a magical cleaner and deodorizer or all alcohol.  So, before you substitute Gin or Jack Daniels for your vodka, I would ask the help of an expert.  I think any bartender would do.

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8 thoughts on “The Miracle Known as Vodka”

  1. Gee, being able to take an occasional swig of the cleaning agent could do a lot to make housework more enjoyable.

  2. Did you know that Vodka was more expensive to use than products already on the market to remove goo, deodorize a room or clean showers. But you don’t have as much fun use that other stuff. 🙂

  3. I can’t believe all these years I’ve been cleaning my shower with gin!

  4. As a man who knows very little, this was fascinating reading but something did cross my feeble mind as I was inhaling the fumes of learning: why would you waste good vodka on removing goo, deodorizing a room or cleaning a shower, when you could drink it instead and wake up believing the world is great and there is no Bon Jovi?

    Hey, I’ve had another thought this week: you should link in with Kathy and her ‘Points To remember’. With your knowledge of vodka and Kathy’s knowledge of other stuff, I could learn so much and one day, turn into a grown up!

    1. You know something else? What I don’t know, I make up. It adds a lot of spice to my writing.

  5. Being a nurse, my wife uses alcohol swabs to get adhesive off; it works great! So, I think any alcohol would work; save your best for drinking!

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