Life Lessons From Strange Places

football

I went to a college in Tennessee that insisted on holding its football players to the same academic standards as everyone else. This put our school at a serious competitive disadvantage in attracting players. If you were walking across campus and someone said “Hey, isn’t that guy on the basketball team?” you’d just sigh dejectedly and say “Nope, he’s a linebacker.” So, our team basically blew.

Every year we had a Homecoming game. It was a huge deal, with alumni flooding into Nashville from all around the region. Most southern schools that are part of the Southeastern Conference have a similarly huge game. In Alabama it’s called the Iron Bowl, which pits Auburn against Alabama.

How big is the Iron Bowl? After the most recent game a woman shot her friend with a gun because the friend wasn’t sufficiently excited about the shooter’s team winning. The friend survived, but the other woman definitely won The Lead Bowl.

Suffice it to say, I headed far to the West after graduating.

So anyway, one year at the Homecoming game the score was tied with something like ten seconds to go. My school’s team got the ball down to the twenty yard line. The kicker walked onto the field.

The crowd was jubilant. After a long losing season we were about to snag a win at the biggest game of the year. With a field goal this easy, the game was in the bag. People started hooting and hollering. Dudes high-fived one another. The victory party had begun.

The Center snapped the ball. Another player caught it and set it up cleanly for the kick. The kicker took two steps forward and kicked the ball.

And fifty thousand cheering people watched it sail four feet wide of the goal post. The party ended suddenly as a hush befell the stadium. Then came the roar. All around me, guys who couldn’t kick a ball through the uprights if they were a mile wide and ten feet away went ballistic. They called for the kicker’s head.

I think I was the only one on our side who was laughing. I sensed that I was witnessing some sort of metaphor about life. There was definitely a lesson to be learned here on this esteemed college campus.

I felt for the kicker. He easily had the worst job in college sports. But what a great moment it was.

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5 thoughts on “Life Lessons From Strange Places”

  1. Well, “Hay-ull Yeah!” from Tennessee. We southern belles are always packin’. LOVE Nashvegas. Was there this weekend. Never got past the Opry Mills Outlets to make it to see the xmas decorations at the Opryland Hotel. BTW – I did watch the Auburn v Alabama game this year. I wasn’t rooting for a certain team, but I’ve never seen a more exciting college game! Talk about shanking field goals!
    Where did you go to college? I’m a University of Memphis grad. (Formerly Memphis State, always Tiger High).

  2. I’d like to meet that woman who shot her friend because she wasn’t excited enough about the team winning. I don’t think I’d marry her but if I was in the market for a wife, I wouldn’t totally rule her out!

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