Rookie Vatican Fireman Causes $2 Million In Damages Dousing Sistine Chapel Smoke

Papal Conclave Smoke

A rookie Vatican firefighter, Giuseppe Vanotti, caused $2 million in damages to the Sistine Chapel earlier today when he mistook the black smoke billowing from the historic church during the papal conclave to be an out of control fire.

“I’m a sorry… I didn’t know,” said Vanotti, “I just a started last week. But I see a the smoke and I say ‘Hey, there’s a smoke!’ so I get a my hose. I was just a trying to help.”

Ruined by the water damage from the errant hose were several dozen robes, 3 flat screen TVs, a high tech whole church audio system, and 400 cases of Eucharist wafers, which are now way too soggy to serve.

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3 thoughts on “Rookie Vatican Fireman Causes $2 Million In Damages Dousing Sistine Chapel Smoke”

  1. They weren’t vanilla wafers were they? I could live with them going actually, but if communion came in thin mints, I would be really ticked at Giuseppe.

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