Let me start off by saying that I am about to offend someone. I don’t know who, but I smell offense in the offing. Why? Because I have a serious question and when I ask this question, people are going to say, “Ooh, that’s a tad insensitive,” or “You should have left this one alone.”
But since common sense and myself don’t always see eye to eye, I am going to ask anyway.
Okay, here it goes:
Why do people have stickers on the rear windows of cars that say “In memory of ” with a person’s birth and death date? I don’t understand why people need to display this type of information on their cars. Is their vehicle dedicated to the deceased? Is the deceased resting in peace in the wheel well?
I am not being disrespectful; I just don’t get it. I do get the ribbons for the various diseases and conditions; I get the stickers that tell the world where you vacation or where you like to travel; I get the perfect little family stick figures; I get school and college decals; I get decals that brag about loving a certain dog breed or loving dogs that have no clear breed; I get stickers that boast about kids’ academic achievements or their activities; and I even get that people want to use their cars as a soapbox for their political views. But I don’t get the death announcement sticker.
I guarantee you that if I pulled up alongside someone with the death sticker on their car and asked how the person on the sticker died, the driver would most likely think I was a death groupie and tell me to mind my business. If you don’t want people to ask questions, why is it plastered on your car window?
I will admit that when I see one of these decals, my heart breaks. If I am behind the wheel, I will inch my car closer so I can read the entire sticker and then I tend to sigh out loud if the person on the sticker was young. But my pity will end quickly if the driver stops short and I find that I can read the sticker clearly only because I am attached to the mourning person’s bumper.
So, I am back to my original question: why the sticker? Is it meant to be a notice of public mourning in the modern era? I guess it’s not that odd. At one time, grief used to be pretty public. For example, widows wore black well after the funeral. Mourning attire sent a message that said they were sad and more important–off limits to men. The black clothing usually disappeared about the time the bereaved started to realize that her mood might be lifted with an overnight date. But honestly, I have witnessed women give up a multi-colored wardrobe permanently after the demise of their spouses. Some of these women liked the fact that mourning black made them look slimmer, while others adopted it as a way to say “No man, nowhere can live up to my dead husband, and so there is no reason to even try—so back off!”
I don’t know if the death decals will remain popular. I don’t even know where grieving people get them. Do they come in a souvenir packet from funeral homes? Well, if they do maintain popularity, I can see the companies that specialize in these decals expanding their car stickers to include other memorials for luggage, sporting equipment, iPad covers, garden flags, pet clothing, t-shirts and, of course, the obligatory baseball caps. Yes, death truly is a sticky business.
My wife has the exact same reaction as you. The one that really puzzles me is the sticker memorializing that NASCAR driver who died (can’t recall his name). You’re so torn up about somebody you don’t even know that you have it permanently emblazoned on your back window?
I’m always here for you Don Don’s. If you don’t know who to offend, go right ahead and offend Bill Y. It’s water off a dolphin’s back to me. More than two people have told me that I’m dead inside on more than two occasions so you just offend to your hearts content!
I can always count on you Bill Y! Thanks!
The worst is when your’re laying on the horn at a red light and screaming “Hey pal,move it or you’ll be adding another sticker to the car – yours!” And who names their dog Name Goes Here? Oops, got carried away, this is a perplexing question that you raise.
I am afraid to lay on the horn Tom. 1) Someone might yell at me and say, “Can’t you see this person is in mourning, and they will think I am very mean. 2) What if the dead person minds and sits up in the back seat?
I am also worried that while they chose to name their poodle Name Goes Here, in the 48 years that they had the dam dog they couldn’t think of a better name
I long ago figured out that people are going to do what people do no matter what, so the best thing to do is just say “Meh!” and go on to the next interesting thing.
This is all rendered invalid, of course, when the behavior in question involves something that must be read from another vehicle. That’s a whole other story.
It is a puzzle Kathy!
Good questions Donna. I almost rear-ended someone trying to read a lengthy traveling obituary on the back window of a mini-van. Then I realized they had the cliff note stickers on the side windows. 😉
Wow a long and short version? I can’t imagine this is more practical than newspaper obits.
It is apparently a part of the social media instant messaging mania that we many have become addicted to where putting something, anything, out there for public consumption possesses us and looks for an instantaneous response
I agree LB! For some reason in today’s world, some people think the world wants or needs to know every detail of their life. Not a fan of this!