A leading industry which makes a well known product has graciously alerted the public to the fact that there is a dangerous and disruptive shortage certainly coming in the possibly near future.
An industry spokesman says that this shortage is almost assuredly unavoidable, leaving only one prudent course of action, which is to hysterically stock up on as much of the product as can reasonably be stored in your basement, garage, freezer, or guest bedroom.
The spokesman goes on to claim that “the anticipated shortage is expected to be the result of complex market forces as well as unavoidable global pressures that are really far beyond the comprehension of the average consumer.”
Due to this imminent shortage, the industry has been forced to raise prices in order to protect the consumer from the effects of unscrupulous speculators.
I have written a letter to the industry to inform them that because of their manipulative practices, I will be boycotting whatever business they operate.
Thank goodness we have people out there watching out for us!