DISCLAIMER:
I’ll admit that I don’t own a gun. So,on the topic of guns I’m like Nancy Reagan and her Just Say No campaign on drugs — I lack personal experience with the issue, so chances are good that I’m talking out of my ass here. But like Nancy, I’ll just ignore this fact and forge ahead as an “expert.”
Okay, now that we’ve got that out of the way, I’m here to say that guns are great things. Here’s why:
Police were recently dispatched to a house where they arrived to find a man bleeding from the mouth and nose. The guy told officers what had happened. You’re probably thinking that the bleeding was caused by eating at Taco Bell. But no, the guy had simply taken off his pants and dropped them onto a dresser.
At which point the pistol in his pants went off. Fortunately, his neck prevented the bullet from damaging a wall (trust me, plaster work isn’t cheap). The unlucky guy survived. But this is a good example of why guys who own guns should only wear dresses.
Here’s the upside. Obamacare is struggling to enroll enough customers, but these accidental self-inflicted gun wounds happen far more often than you think. And neck surgery isn’t cheap. So gun owners who are yet to shoot themselves will rush to sign up for coverage, which just might save the program. This, incidentally, is why those enrollment forms ask if you smoke, but not if you own a gun.
Yup, being awash in guns will definitely keep us all healthier in the long run. Just say yes to guns.
Never would I have thought that the arguments for gun possession and Obamacare would dovetail and be one.
This gives new meaning to the old adage “Is that a gun in your pocket or are you…”