Sweetening The Pot

It’s safe to assume that we don’t know how the world really works. Consider something like this — you’re walking in the yard and you step on a rake, causing the handle to whip up into your forehead (yes, I’ve actually done this). The Universe is probably howling with laughter at its gag, but you can’t hear it. You’re just standing there holding your head and assuming that someone absentmindedly left the rake there. And, unbeknownst to you, that someone was you.

Okay, this single example establishes beyond doubt the fact that humans are clueless about how things work. Let’s move on.

I’m not a cash-using person, but a while ago I started making a point of always having three dollar bills in my wallet. No, this isn’t because I’ve started using cocaine. It’s because I want to be ready to hand them over if someone asks me for money when I’m out and about. I now operate on the simple concept that if the roles were reversed and I was hungry, I’d want the other me to have some cash to spare (and not tell me to screw off).

So now dig this — the last time I was home my Mom had a coupon for a free half-dozen Dunkin’ Donuts. Like most Moms who get complacent once the kids move out, my Mom never had doughnuts around when I visited (that or she took one look at my belly during a previous visit and said “Jesus, I’m not becoming an enabler for that.”). Mom got the coupon from a friend, who passed it along the day before I arrived.

Coincidence? I think not.

So I picked up the doughnuts one morning. As happens with most coupons, I handed it to the guy at the Dunkin’ Donuts near Mom’s house and proceeded to hear him say “This isn’t good at this location.” So I forged on, driving to the struggling store inside the mall and securing a six-pack of jelly crullers and old-fashioned chocolates. By the early evening they were all gone. In her greed and uncontrollable gluttony, my Mom ate one-half of one of them.

Am I suggesting that I’m now some saint? Nope, I’m still an Aint hoping to earn my “S”. Do I think we’re like some dog in a Pavlovian experiment where we get a treat for performing some task? Nope. But I’m starting to suspect that the universe is sweetening the pot to get people to start caring about each other more.

And doughnuts are the obvious choice for that.