Tell me this is not true and you’ll be telling a lie.

This bag looks like a Sergeant Major, yelling at the new recruits to stand to attention.

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How I know so much stuff that doesn’t matter.

Most of the calls I get are from people I don’t know. Back in 1987, Thirsty Dave got 10,001 t-shirts printed. I’m not sure exactly what they said but it went something like “Just before […]

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I’m going to sit on the fence on this one and say Paris Hilton’s rat-dog has more talent than Will Smith.

How did Will Smith get such an unrealistic view of himself? On a scale of one to talent, he’s the facial expression of Kristen Stewart.

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Room For Improvement.

(I) We got one of those modern, large screen TV’s. It’s so immersive that we swam with the dolphins and then had a conversation with a pineapple under the sea. It’s the best thing (I’ve) […]

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Bernie proves she’s not dead by placing paid messages in magazines.

This definitely is Bernie. You can tell because she has is underlined and that’s definitely her signature.

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The Secret Tip aka My Library Opens Tomorrow.

I was looking at books in the local library. They had some really good stuff. It took me a while but I checked out all they had to offer. Fortune was my friend that day […]

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Family/Dog Cooking – The Rachael Ray Way.

Maybe it’s because I come from a different generation or maybe it’s because I’ve never cooked my family and my dog but I find inspiration in totally different ways than Rachael Ray.

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They Don’t Call Him Andy “Fingers” Murray For Nothing.

It’s time to highlight something in maroon color so it doesn’t get missed. Our imaginary son put on his imaginary shoes and ran away with the circus. Because Jill Y and I do not understand math, we […]

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The Great Poets

You should never pretend to be someone or something that you’re not. In 1981, I got ideas above my station and pretended to be funny. It was a thinly veiled pretence that fooled nobody. The […]

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