Darth Waiter.

I told my imaginary son that if he doesn’t behave, he doesn’t get any more toast. He told me that he didn’t like my toast because it was a bit on the dark side:

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Time waits for no eh…man.

I wouldn’t leave my imaginary kids home alone with this eh…dude:

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They don’t call him Sonic “Capable” Hedgehog for no reason.

If this is the standard of television these days, I need to watch more television:

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Love is the strongest force on earth. Happy Valentine’s Day everybody.

I had a few choice words with my imaginary son’s teacher. We didn’t exactly see eye to eye on the grading of one of his tests. I told her that love IS the strongest force […]

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Beck has more creativity in his acceptance speech than Kanye has in his near interruptance speech.

He doesn’t but he should.

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29% of that audience is not cool.

71% of that audience is cool:

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Valentines Day Checklist For Dudes

Babysitter for imaginary (or real) kids √ Realization that no matter what you do, it isn’t going to be enough √ Buy all available shoes √ Tiny invisible earphone to let you discretely listen to […]

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