Category: Relationships
Mrs. Hall’s Sons Now Forced To Masturbate To JC Penney Circular
Teenage boys Jacob and Isaiah Hall, sons of the now famous Mrs. Hall who wrote the viral piece “FYI (If you’re a teenage girl)” which instructed girls how to dress in order to not defile […]
Fifty Shades of Grey: The Movie
The wait is finally over. No, they haven’t found the last golden ticket to Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory (I wish). The leads have been cast for the movie adaptation of the trashy novel…um…sorry…I mean erotic […]
Regrets Regarding the Alec Baldwin Paparazzi Incident
My only regret about Alec Baldwin’s latest confrontation with the paparazzi, is that I wish Baldwin had been wearing calf length black nylon socks with his short pants in order to take the pressure off […]
Jim Meskimen Proves America’s Got Talent
Actor and impressionist Jim Meskimen landed in the quarterfinals of America’s Got Talent this month by pretending to be someone else. While he didn’t win the competition, his winning talent has been keeping us entertained […]
‘Leftover Women’ of China: Meet your ABC ‘Bachelor’!
Apparently the latest trend for women in China is to remain unmarried in their late 20s and 30s. The media has dubbed this phenomenon, “Leftover Women,” which is just about as sweet as when radio […]
Horoscope of Painful Truth, Love Edition
ARIES: That person whose car you deliberately ram into today because she/he cuts you off in traffic was supposed to be the one true love of your life. That will never happen now, because he/she […]
Your Official One Size Fits All Weekend Horoscope
For all you HumorOutcasts readers, this is my weekly weekend one size fits all horoscope I do out of the goodness of my heart on my blog, The Monkey Bellhop. While it may appear that […]