The Language of Learning.
I have an infinitesimal, Lilliputian, teensy-weensy vocabulary and culpability is not mine. When I was littler and I was learning words, there was just too many words to learn. Because of this, I became massively […]
Unicorn Bites 12/13/13
Wife: A guy at work dropped acid Me: Did he listen to techno & babble about colors? W: No, he was treated for burns Chemists are so lame. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December […]
Friday Humor Devotional
Dear Lord, give me the patience not to put my 5-year old son up for adoption this holiday season. It seems decorating the tree with his dad’s shaving cream is what’s trending this year, Amen. […]
One Pension That Could Be Cut
So the debt-obsessed House just passed a budget deal. Not surprisingly, it delivers more bad cuts than a hair-cutting school that’s nearing bankruptcy. And as usual, it leaves out one of the easiest cuts that […]
Throwing elbows
There are power shoppers then there were my mother-in-law and grandmother-in-law. These ladies did geriatric workouts before heading to the stores for their weekly bouts of elbow throwing, you haven’t seen dedication to the art […]
The Bill Y Exercise Regime of Real Greatness
I’m not saying my way is the best way but its way better than your way and that’s a fact. With great responsibility comes great responsibility to make the world or at least its people, […]
Smurf Me! It’s Smurfing Porn!
A man in Stockton, CA rented The Smurfs 2 from a Red Box machine. Even though the disc had the correct label, it turned out to be a hardcore porn movie. In related news, there has […]
Unicorn Bites 12/12/13
Wife: “You’re basically just a penis with a drinking problem.” Me: *hugs her* We finally understand each other. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 12, 2013 My wife texted that she’s having a bad […]
Twerking Away Your Selfie Respect
SLIGHTLY OFF THE MARK Would you like a selfie? How about a twerk? Your confusion could be understandable, especially if you’re not on the internet much. (Are there many people besides my grandmother who […]
Experts: Washington Redskins’ Offensive Signals Are Gibberish
The Washington Redskins have been struggling this season and many have been unable to successfully pinpoint what the exact problem has been at this point in time. But now experts in offensive football signage have […]