Fifty Shades of Grey: The Movie
The wait is finally over. No, they haven’t found the last golden ticket to Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory (I wish). The leads have been cast for the movie adaptation of the trashy novel…um…sorry…I mean erotic […]
Unicorn Bites 9/2/13
My wife: “Did you see that cute toddler?” Me: “Was he the one whose mom had huge boobs?” Not that it helped me any, but that was the one. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) […]
My Own Dream: Inspired by Endurance Swimmer Diana Nyad
Sixty-four year old Diana Nyad finally achieved her lifelong dream of swimming from Cuba to the Florida Keys. This was the fifth try in 35 years for Nyad. In the past, she has had to […]
People Use Social Media to Try to Hook Up? What a Shock!
Recently one of my writing associates who has forums for writers connected to social media issued a number of stern warnings toward men who ask for certain types of pictures and similar information from her and the […]
You selfish son of a female dog.
I’ll keep this brief boys and girls. The reason you’re going to love me today isn’t because I’m a loveable rascal although that I am. No, the reason you’re going to love me today is […]
Unicorn Bites 9/1/13
Not to brag, but I’m the guest of honor at my 3-year-old’s tea party. I outranked all the other invitees: a Barbie and 6 plastic dinosaurs. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 1, 2013 […]
Kathy’s Points to Remember
Don’t buy Royal Doulton if all you can afford is that stuff in the Dollar Store. If you wait long enough, maybe one of your elderly relatives will leave you her good china. If she […]
Wrinkles Eraser Leads to This?
This is an ad that keeps popping up on my Facebook feed. Is it me, or are wrinkles the last problem this woman has to worry about? I guess if your lips look like two […]
Your last breakup vs Your grandpa’s last breakup.
People expect the very worst from me and I rarely let them down. When it comes to my idiotic ways, thinking before speaking is as rare as the irony of dying in a living room. […]
Unicorn Bites 8/31/13
I used to get my wife drunk so I could get lucky. Now I get her drunk so she’ll fall asleep and I can get even drunker. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) August 31, […]