A boy was found dead yesterday. He was a student at Miller Elementary. Teachers really didn’t know much about him. He was not a very good student and did not talk to many people. He […]
The trailer park houses a lot of different characters. They come in all shapes and sizes and sexual orientation. This is my story of Rickie, the gay truck driver who lives in the park. I […]
It’s about 5:45pm and the girlfriend walks in the front door, she’s coming home from work. Her arrival occurs as I am walking out of the bathroom… my pants are unzipped and a tuft of […]
NFL player Plaxico Burress was released from prison today. So his status has changed from “locked up” to “locked out”.
Shopping for a man’s gift always presents a challenge. Sure there are the golf clubs, the practical-yet-always-welcome-case of beer, the 52-inch dream TV, but for some men, these popular gifts are not enough. Some men […]
Mother Nature must be a man. Who else would play this mid-life trick on women? Women lose their sex drive and men get Viagra. I’d like to thank the pharmaceutical industry for their complicity. I’m […]
I’m gonna open a massage parlor called “Happy Endings.” I’ll show Disney movies during your session, followed by a hand job..
I was sick a couple of weeks ago when I walked into a used car dealership. I had just come out of the hospital with a combination asthma, bronchitis, and pneumonia attack, so I wasn’t […]
I’m tired of all these needy people, always refusing to take responsibility for themselves, and crying at the slightest discomfort. Babies should just grow up already. They’re bald and toothless, anti-social, and they can’t give […]
Being a man who has made a meager living writing revisionist history in my award-winning American History series—a series no less an authority than my wife refers to as “that stupid shit you write”—I know […]