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My Grandma

June 7, 2011
By

Whenever I’m alone with my thoughts, I wonder if my grandma is looking down on me, then I wonder why she likes to watch me take a crap. She was always a little different. I…

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Grand Canyon

June 7, 2011
By

I’ve always loved the Grand Canyon, and I just figured out why. It’s the Earth’s vagina.

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Women Can’t Take Compliments

June 7, 2011
By

People say that men are clueless. That we should pay more compliments to women. Well, I got kicked in the groin for paying a woman a compliment. We were all down at down at the…

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Six Signs Your Significant Other is Cheating

June 7, 2011
By

  How can you tell if your significant other is cheating? These six signs will tell the tale for them. They stop caring if they fart in front of you, and actually make every attempt…

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Taking Down the Superbug

June 7, 2011
By

More powerful than most viruses; able to ward off antibiotics in massive doses, faster spreading than Mono in a room filled with  horny teenagers: It’s a germ; it’s a bacteria; it’s a Superbug!  Yes, here…

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America’s New Favorite Pastime

June 7, 2011
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For at least the past 100 years, baseball has been considered America’s Favorite Pastime, and given that there was no TV or Internet available for most of those 100 years, it makes some amount of…

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Cartoon Gaydar

June 7, 2011
By

Texas Governor Rick Perry is calling on all governors throughout the United States to come to Houston for a prayer rally. The event is sponsored by the American Family Association, which certainly sounds “American” and…

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Shift Work Sleep Disorder?

June 7, 2011
By

I heard a commercial on the radio pushing a prescription for something called “Shift Work Sleep Disorder”. Apparently this “disorder” is characterized by having distorted sleep patterns after working late shifts such as 11pm-7am. Messed…

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Dane Cook (The Roast of a Water Head)

June 7, 2011
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Dane Cook (The Roast of a Water Head)

He may have peaked four years ago, but that doesn’t mean it is easy to escape his inane drivel. That’s right… I’m saying that Dane Cook is a talentless tool. I know that I cannot…

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iCloud

June 7, 2011
By

Steve Jobs recently wandered out of his cave and announced “iCloud”. Which I suppose is probably just like all of the other “cloud” services that everyone else is offering, but probably with worse performance and…

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Characteristics That Inspire

June 7, 2011
By

You expect people to generally value the same characteristics in a prospective candidate for office. Most people value things like leadership, determination, honesty, and the ability to take a really good picture of the bulge…

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NFL humor

June 7, 2011
By

First, Michael Vick and now there is a rumor that the Eagles might get new prison grad Plaxico Burress. I guess  the Eagles are the NFL’s official halfway house.

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Aunt Lottie and the Panty Thief

June 6, 2011
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I hadn’t heard from Aunt Lottie in quite a while, so I gave her a call.  “Aunt Lottie, where have you been?  You haven’t dropped by lately.  You must have been really busy.” “No, child,…

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Oy vey!

June 6, 2011
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Two elderly gentlemen were sitting on a bench chatting while they waited for their bus.  Their casual conversation eventually leads them to talking about sex.  One gentleman asked the other, “So how often do you…

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Death Notice You Will Never Read

June 6, 2011
By

A boy was found dead yesterday. He was a student at Miller Elementary. Teachers really didn’t know much about him. He was not a very good student and did not talk to many people. He…

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The Truck Driver in the Trailer Park

June 6, 2011
By

The trailer park houses a lot of different characters. They come in all shapes and sizes and sexual orientation. This is my story of Rickie, the gay truck driver who lives in the park. I…

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A Lesson Learned

June 6, 2011
By
A Lesson Learned

It’s about 5:45pm and the girlfriend walks in the front door, she’s coming home from work. Her arrival occurs as I am walking out of the bathroom… my pants are unzipped and a tuft of…

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An NFL Moment

June 6, 2011
By

NFL player Plaxico Burress was released from prison today. So his status has changed from “locked up” to “locked out”.

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The Sexy Robot — Have Relationships Come to This?

June 6, 2011
By

Shopping for a man’s gift always presents a challenge. Sure there are the golf clubs, the practical-yet-always-welcome-case of beer, the 52-inch dream TV, but for some men, these popular gifts are not enough. Some men…

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Blue M & M’s

June 5, 2011
By

Mother Nature must be a man. Who else would play this mid-life trick on women? Women lose their sex drive and men get Viagra. I’d like to thank the pharmaceutical industry for their complicity. I’m…

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Happy Endings

June 5, 2011
By

 I’m gonna open a massage parlor called “Happy Endings.” I’ll show Disney movies during your session, followed by a hand job..

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How to Write and Share Humor
By Donna Cavanagh Published by HumorOutcasts Press

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It Comes From Within: Living with Bipolar Illness
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