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Is Mom Hef’s New Girlfriend?

June 17, 2011
By

Mom, Hugh Hefner is on the market again. This could be a big opportunity for you as maybe he’s finally going to date age-appropriate women. Yes, it’s true; his nuptuals to Crystal Harris, the 25-year-old…

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Dude, That is so Gay

June 17, 2011
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Dude, That is so Gay

A guy walks into a bathroom stall, he chooses the handicapped stall because I am standing at the lone urinal. This particular bathroom setup has always bothered me… two or more stalls and one urinal.…

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The Challenge of Avoiding Sharks

June 17, 2011
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The Challenge of Avoiding Sharks

I had lunch with my high school friends last week, and we started to talk about exercising which led to my one friend talking about this triathlon event that is being held in her New…

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Happy Bloomsday!!!

June 17, 2011
By

This is the first year that I am happy to celebrate Bloomsday, the longest day in literary history. If you didn’t know, June 16th, 1904 was the day James Joyce chose to follow the main…

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Birthday Clown

June 17, 2011
By

The clown at my son’s birthday party was so bad that he made a balloon animal by sticking an air compressor hose in my dog’s mouth.

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Deja Vu moments?

June 16, 2011
By

I thought I was having a lot of deja vu moments but I realized I was just in a big rut doing the same thing over and over again.

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Defusing a Hot Tub Disaster

June 16, 2011
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Defusing a Hot Tub Disaster

Many people are aware of the relationship I have with my hot tub or as those in the industry call it, my “spa”.  My spa came to me in 2005.  I fell in love with…

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Sarahpalinite

June 16, 2011
By

Ok, so Kryptonite makes superman weak. Sarahpalinite kills his brain cells. Just, you know, for future reference. http://wcti.us/00EK

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Breaking Weiner News

June 16, 2011
By

The early word today is that Representative Anthony Weiner is stepping down from his position soon. Citing the overwhelming scheduling demands of Congress, he simply did not have enough time in his day to send…

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Negative People

June 16, 2011
By

Negative people are like vampires. They will just suck every last bit of  life out of you.    

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Fear

June 15, 2011
By

FDR: All we have to fear is fear itself. And Hitler. Stalin. Tojo. Eleanor when she’s pissed off. You don’t want that. http://wcti.us/0013

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Rush Limbaugh

June 15, 2011
By

Hold the presses, I just found out that Rush Limbaugh is not a satirical character, but a real person. WTF?

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Retirement

June 15, 2011
By

I used to dream that if I worked hard, and saved enough money, I could retire early. Now, I just dream that I won’t kill myself by Saturday.

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The Price of Gas

June 15, 2011
By
The Price of Gas

The hardest part of a new relationship is the stress of wondering what she’ll do the first time I pass gas while we’re in bed together. It’s one thing to fart when I’m out with…

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Looking for a Few Good Revolutionaries? Try the New Secret Internet

June 15, 2011
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Are you a government overthrower who is sick and tired of the slow Internet? Do you try to get word to your fellow revolutionaries only to be hit by pop-up ads and spam in your…

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Evolution of Dirty Talk

June 15, 2011
By

Ever since its inception, Hollywood had played a major role in influencing our society. Each time we watch a movie, we try emulating the lifestyles, fashion, and mannerisms of the heroes and heroines in the…

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A Letter to Representative Anthony Weiner

June 15, 2011
By

Dear Representative Weiner: My name is Mayor Tom Lund; I’m a highly respected fellow politician from Western Pennsylvania.  I’m very upset over your recent behavior. It’s politicians like you that puts a dark cloud over our…

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Dear (insert name) Thank You

June 14, 2011
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“Dear Debbie Martina-Weber, thank you for your recent interest in our dandruff shampoo.  We hope you enjoy your free sample and become an Itchy Twitchy Shampoo user.” I hate pop-up ads!  I have one of…

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Is My Face in Flames?

June 14, 2011
By

I am a weather phobe. There is not much about a weather report that doesn’t scare the bejesus out of me. I considered the Channel 5 weatherman in Chicago a mortal enemy as he seemed…

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FREE COFFEE!

June 14, 2011
By
FREE COFFEE!

The most entertaining parts of my life are the conversations between my girlfriend and I. She’s a wonderful sport because no matter what she says, I have a knack for taking it to a ridiculous…

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Twitter

June 14, 2011
By

The “Real” Jesus Christ followed me, de-followed me and followed me again on Twitter. I don’t know if I should be flattered or just really worried.

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