Unicorn Bites 10/4/13
My 3-year-old said she likes tea parties, so I made her sleep in the yard. We don’t tolerate politics in this house. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 4, 2013 If a guy […]
Tag: funny
Johnny “The Sandwich Creator” Evans and the Mexican Restaurant Wall.
There are never enough stories about Thirsty Dave so this story will be about Scurvy Jane. Scurvy Jane is unique in that she is related to her brothers as well as her sisters. She wasn’t […]
Unicorn Bites 10/2/13
The guy who fixed the crack in my windshield was named Chip. Now there’s a man who achieved exactly what was expected of him in life. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 2, 2013 […]
Perfect Polly the Pretend Parakeet
What do you do when your sweet old mother wants a pet but you don’t think she can handle the responsibility anymore? You get her a moving stuffed bird called Perfect Polly. Yep, the battery-operated […]
Don’t ever degrade my girlfriend like that again.
I know an English teacher who reads what I write. She tells me that she doesn’t like the way I refer to myself in the third person. I told her that Bill Y doesn’t like […]
Unicorn Bites 10/1/13
Me: “There’s something in my shoe.” My wife: “What is it?” Me: “My foot.” I’m as amazed as anyone that she occasionally has sex with me. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 1, 2013 […]
Interview with Jesus
I had to do a phone interview with a Jesus performer – I don’t know if that is the right term, but he is an actor who only plays Jesus. I feel I have to […]
The Business Mindset
Whether or not you care for the woman or her products, you’ve got to admit that Martha Stewart is one savvy businessperson. From a beginning as just another cookbook author, she’s managed to create a […]