Unicorn Bites 9/20/13
I found an amazing cure for world hunger. It’s called “food.” When starving people eat it, it eliminates their starvation 100% of the time. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 20, 2013 Boss: Do […]
Tag: humoroutcasts
Vatican Says Popemobile Brake System Malfunction After Pope’s Conciliatory Comments on Gays and Abortion “Purely Coincidental”
A Vatican spokesman announced that any link between Pope Francis’ recent conciliatory comments regarding atheists, gays, abortion, and birth control and an accident where the Popemobile’s braking system appeared to malfunction is purely coincidental. The […]
Josh The Inquisitive.
Some kids don’t have an inquisitive mind. Josh is not one of those kids. In a world where communication is very much based on the ever-changing pulse of technology, Josh prefers to write letters, make […]
Unicorn Bites 9/19/13
I’ve watched “Aladdin” like 25 times with my kids, so I know quite a bit about politics in the Middle East. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 19, 2013 Coworker: “I’m a Vikings […]
The New Pope Fragrance
Excelsis Fine Fragrances has released a new cologne entitled Francis after the Pope. Arriving just in time for the holidays, the fragrance company is expecting big sales for nothing is more attractive to a woman […]
Unicorn Bites 9/18/13
If the "Goosebumps" books really wanted to scare kids they’d tell the story of a boy who grows up & dies a little each day at a job he hates — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn […]
Leave It to the Beaver
Recently, I wrote a short piece on the fragrant anal glands of beavers. Who would have thought that this topic would get such attention; yet, it did. Anyway, questions were emailed–some that would make my […]
Truth be told
I was talking to Jill Y about something which had no right to be spoken about when I told her that in a blind taste test, hungry people chose a hot breakfast over cold cereal […]
When there are so many words that can be used, it’s hard to know the right ones to use.
The girl on the train doesn’t even know I exist. This is evident by her “you don’t exist to me” t-shirt. I tried for 257 consecutive days to work up the courage to speak to […]