An Excerpt From Democracy In America, Revised Edition




This happened recently in Miami. Is it:

a)      Proof that the Advertising team at Marlboro shouldn’t have gone with the lowest bidder?

b)      A public service announcement cleverly hinting at the dangers of smoking? Or

c)      A bonding session between coworkers?

If you guessed “c” you are correct. A police officer tried to pull over a driver for a traffic infraction. After a minor chase, the driver pulled to the curb. A fist-fight ensued. And it emerged that the driver was a Lieutenant in the same department as the police officer.

Don’t American organizations hold Christmas parties to avoid exactly this type of thing?

In my travels in America one thing really stands out, and it’s not that the jeans men wear are far less tight than in my hometown of Baguette-Avec-Gris-Poupon. Nope, it’s that American dudes seem naturally inclined to treat everything like a football match where the sole objective is “winning,” using force as needed. And this seems to feed a mindset that problems are things to be crushed, like a bug you set afire with spray-paint and a cigarette lighter.

This got me wondering what percentage of the American Congress is comprised of women. So I did some research and found this:

Women In National Parliaments (Source: some French site)

Sweden: 45%

Finland: 42.5%

Netherlands: 37.3%

Canada: 32.3%

And down in 85th place I saw the US, at a whopping 18.5%.

So, the revised version of Democracy will explore the following question: what if the problems Congress keeps having really aren’t related to Left/Right differences? What if the real problem is a perpetual mano-a-mano sword-fight fueled by cash instead of doughnuts?

I went to the nation’s capital to begin researching my hypothesis. And while sitting in a congressional conference room I saw this:


Mon dieu! Even down on the French Riviera, no one wears cowboy boots with a Speedo.

I’ve been living in one of the sane states while I revise my great-grandfather’s magnum opus. Both of the senators here are women. I don’t think that’s a coincidence.

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One thought on “An Excerpt From Democracy In America, Revised Edition”

  1. Don’t ever mess mass with Scandinavian, women politicians. No good can come from it or so I’m told!

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