Silliman on Sports
By Stan Silliman
NFL OBSESSED: 2014 DRAFT TWEETS
It is crazy how many folks froth over the NFL draft. We’ve scoured Twittersville for the oddest and funniest tweets. Not surprisingly, a huge number relate to Johnny Manziel. Also, there were a lot of tweets about Missouri defensive end, Michael Sam, going to the Rams.
On first pick, Jadeveon Clowney: Reporter: “What did you study at Clemson?” Clowney: “At Clemson? Excuse you?”
From Rick Reilly: “They’re opening up champagne bortles in Jacksonville.”
From Jeopardy Sports: “AFTER GETTING DRAFTED WHERE HE DID, THIS NFL PLAYER HAS STARTED DRINKING AND WILL LIKELY NOT STOP UNTIL HE KILLS HIMSELF.” Answer: “Who is: Johnny Manziel?”
From Peyton’s Head: “A homeless guy told Jimmy Haslem to draft Johnny Manziel. That homeless guy – Brady Quinn.”
From LeBron: “Yo, Johnny. You only got to stay in Cleveland for three years.”
From Hal Fast: “Johnny Football went from his hoped Johnny Texan to… ur… Johnny Jaguar to… ur… Johnny Viking to… ur… Johnny Bills to… ur… Johnny Cowboy to… ur… Johnny Cleveland.”
From J. Graven: “As he awaited each team’s selection, Johnny’s hand signals covered the spectrum: Two handed Money, One handed money, Arnold, Dr. Strangelove (pick me), Carol Burnett, shrug and a what-for”
From Tom Kessenich: “Johnny Manziel’s girlfriend just texted Blake Bortles her number.”
The NFL set up two twitter categories regarding Manziel – #SadManziel and #Before Johnny Gets Drafted. This was not very professional for a professional sports league but yet quite funny. Here are a few SadManziels: “Is the commissioner going to introduce Johnny as the first openly sad player?” “Johnny’s wiping tears with his dollars” “OMG. Somebody just whispered to Johnny that NBC’s Community was canceled”
Some of the best BJGDs were “OJ finds the real killers”, “Derrick Rose plays basketball” “Adam Sandler makes a good movie” “The Cubs win the World Series” “Mel Kiper’s hair gets mussed” “Someone will see the movie ‘Draft Day’” “Flight 370 is found” “Johnny signs five hundred cards” “Manti Teo will have a real girlfriend” “Fox News forgets the name Benghazi” “A lady actually says ‘Hello’ back on the show ‘Hello, Ladies’” “Ken Ham becomes an evolutionary biologist”
Some people thought a picture of Alabama player Ha Ha Clinton-Dix at a restaurant showed a marijuana cigarette but it was a rolled up piece of tissue. You know who got the last laugh?