Can’t Find the Words | HumorOutcasts

Can’t Find the Words

September 8, 2017

Why is childish a word, but we can’t say infantishadultish or seniorish?

At this stage in my life, I ping-pong between infantish and seniorishOften at the same time, too, like when I forget the nipple on my beer bottle and I soak my orthopedic shoes. How about a beer cup holder for my walker? Like, obvi.

It would be nice to have some words to describe these precious moments.

Bile is not a word that pops its head up at parties too often. It describes a dark green to yellowish-brown fluid produced by the liver of most vertebrates. My mom raised me to think that this substance was called Thanksgiving gravy.

And yet we are entirely comfortable saying mobile, even though the word is mostly made of bile. We buy our brand new babies a mobile. And you thought the diaper was disgusting.

What about nubile – a woman of marriageable age.

I’m not sure why women put up with this description. There is no comparable word for a man of marriageable age, other than night in shining armour.

That’s a load of bile if I’ve ever seen any.


I am a graphic designer, humour writer, musician and piano teacher. And that's only during the day. At night I fight crime and hang out with my wonderful family.

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