Grade School Valentine’s Boxes | HumorOutcasts

Grade School Valentine’s Boxes

February 16, 2017


Remember those boxes that you had to make to collect your grade school Valentine’s Day cards?  Remember how you went home and looked through them as soon as you got home, just to see if you got one from everyone YOU gave one to or, on whom you should hold a grudge on until next year?  Or remember how anxious you were to find out if that girl or boy, that you had a grade-school crush on, wrote anything special on their card to you.. other than the extra legs that they had to draw on some of the letters, just to make it look like their words were written all on the same baseline?

Some of the boys made sure that they decorated their boxes in sports themes so they didn’t look like wusses. (Did I spell that correctly?)

If you were the kid that made your own box… covering it with paper, scotch tape, drawing on it with marker, but then crayon too because you didn’t have the color marker that you needed to finish so you “mixed the mediums,” then stuck pretty much anything you could to it, including a crinkled napkin and belly-button lint, just to cover up the paper seams or the coloring mistakes….you were sooooooooooo proud of your box…..until you got to school.

But once you got to school and saw everyone’s boxes, you realized there were some devils in the crowd.  Kids who had boxes that looked like they were designed by the the Macy’s Day Parade float designers!  Despite all of the fuss the other kids or the teachers were making about those boxes, it SCALDED you because you knew that their parents had made them… not helped them… made them.

Well, I was always that kid that made my own and I even had the glue gun burns on my fingers to prove it. And this blog post is for those kids who had their parents make their Valentine Boxes…..

I hope you enjoyed your parents doing your Valentine Boxes.  My guess is that, in your adult hood, you’re a guy  that has to call your spouse from the grocery store aisle 4 times if they don’t have exactly what you were sent to get.  And, when you don’t get your way at work or someone gets a recognition that you didn’t get, you form a new lunch-group that doesn’t include “that suck-up.”  But you’re definitely the person who doesn’t admit that it’s your lunch that’s was in the work refrigerator for the past two months stinking up the entire floor.

Hope you all had a great Valentine’s Day, Ya Jagoffs!!

John Chamberlin

I write about Jagoffs, i.e. stupid politicians, awful sports officials, dumb criminals, bad drivers, ignorant people and on and on. BTW, Jagoff is NOT a swear word. It can be just as confusing as their, there and they're. Sometimes it's actually used as a term of endearment. My Pittsburgh blog is Twitter is @YaJagoff.

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3 Responses to Grade School Valentine’s Boxes

  1. February 17, 2017 at 5:26 am

    In our class everyone made out a Valentine for everyone else, no exceptions. I suppose it was an early lesson in communism … but it sure cut down on the hard feelings.

  2. February 16, 2017 at 3:36 pm

    I remember these!

  3. February 16, 2017 at 12:25 pm


    Valentine’s Day in elementary school was painful in more ways than one!

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