Shoulda Paid for Delivery.. a Poem | HumorOutcasts

Shoulda Paid for Delivery.. a Poem

August 10, 2017


Perhaps the closest U-Haul location was flooded by the recent rain.  That has to be it! Let’s hope that a phone call was made to the U-Haul location to arrange for a rental and boo, the rain has flooded the fleet prohibiting the rental process.  Or maybe the delivery fee was some ungodly, astronomical amount that maybe, just maybe, was hiked up for some pre-fall or late summer sale that will launch days later to make the absorbent delivery fee not seem so horrid.  A final possibility is that the friend, cousin, brother-in-law, neighbor and old college roommate, called upon for this move, was just ridiculously busy with that ‘thing’ he had going on instead of carting this item appropriately in a truck.  At any rate, this should not happen and it immediately prompted this recognizable rhyme:

This item cannot, and will not, fit like a pair of college jeans,

No matter how you squeeze, nope, not by any means.


You did not transport with a truck,

so see the item just got stuck.


A U-haul was a no go, too,

so what did this silly jagoff do?


Didn’t ask a friend or pal,

didn’t ask a soul at all.


Through a window, it was shoved and crammed,

haphazardly positioned and awkwardly jammed.


So all passersby can do, is point and shake their heads,

Ya jagoff, you should have thought it through and maybe planned ahead!

Thanks to @BurgherMan for being today’s Honorary Jagoff Catcher.

And thanks to Guest Blogger, Rachael Rennebeck for the blog post!

John Chamberlin

I write about Jagoffs, i.e. stupid politicians, awful sports officials, dumb criminals, bad drivers, ignorant people and on and on. BTW, Jagoff is NOT a swear word. It can be just as confusing as their, there and they're. Sometimes it's actually used as a term of endearment. My Pittsburgh blog is Twitter is @YaJagoff.

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2 Responses to Shoulda Paid for Delivery.. a Poem

  1. August 14, 2017 at 8:31 am

    Yes, a few extra bucks would have been worth it!

  2. August 11, 2017 at 11:58 pm

    A carjacker with a yen for an SUV would have an easy time with this one. He’d just follow the SUV to the next stoplight and enter it through the back! LOL!

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