Dearest Nancy,
I have written you a letter – in my typical word salad –
Where I lay out all the reasons your impeachment is invalid.
You are breaking your allegiance and declaring open war.
And it’s not true when you say that I’m the one you’re praying for.
Now, let’s take the term “impeachment” – it’s an ugly word you’ve cheapened,
And it’s clear that in response I now have gone right off the deep end.
Your attacks on my behavior are preposterous and brazen;
In response to my election – you’ve pursued nullification.
Your actions have been spiteful, and your conduct is egregious
With these fake investigations – all a hoax, under your aegis.
More due process was afforded during Witch Trials held in Salem.
(And I keep on saying “transcript,” but the words are not verbatim.)
Against every shred of truth, fact, evidence and legal principle,
The Democrats are acting as if their stance is invincible.
You’re subverting our Democracy, and questioning my fitness. Is
Perhaps that why Chuck Schumer wants to call upon new witnesses?
It’s quite clear to me and all Republicans, who see your heart is in
Your quest to stage a coup that is illegal, also partisan.
Perhaps what’s most insulting is your false front of solemnity.
I’ll gladly testify – under a grant of full indemnity.
The voters will not soon forgive the justice you’ve perverted –
Even though, right on the front lawn of the White House, I once blurted
That I’d welcome China’s help, just as I asked for from Zelenskyy.
Who will suffer from this most? We’ll wait one hundred years, and then see.
From my long list of accomplishments, you’re trying to distract:
I’ve achieved so much it almost fills one lengthy paragraph.
You’ve inflicted hurt and damage on my children, missus, on me.
Here’s my thoughts, they are indelible. (signed) Hugs and kisses, Donnie.