“It’s a design flaw, pure and simple,” God Almighty told The New York Times yesterday in an exclusive interview. “The control panel inside the male brain has a manual override that is connected to his genitalia. Here’s where the flaw comes in: occasionally the gear shift in men can spontaneously pop out of ‘Complex Cognitive Processing’ and into ‘Primeval Manual Override’ without warning, and at the most inappropriate times.
“We plan to recall all current models of men and boys by the end of 2020. I promise you that we’re going to find a way to fix this problem, no matter what it takes, or how long it takes.”