Empire State Heels | HumorOutcasts

Empire State Heels

August 21, 2012
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It’s virtually impossible to find an old, reliable pair of 2” black pumps anymore—no frills, no fluff; just a pointed toe with a conservative heel. I am a slave to fashion and love to see a put together outfit that exudes there was some thought put into the end result. It screams confidence to the beholder. There are certain ensembles—like a gorgeous tailored suit, that just don’t have quite the impact when married with a pair of ballerina flats. I envy women who are courageous enough to step up into those sassy, twenty inch heels that seem to be procreating in all the shoe venues. Secretly, I thank them for taking one for the girls’ team all in the name of fashion. I simply cannot do it anymore. My feet revolt every time I challenge them to the notion. I suppose the only negative comment I have is (unless you’re a professional model), there aren’t a lot of women out there who have mastered the runway stomp when they wear those shoes. Most times, Herman Munster and that clunky walk he had come to mind. But I gotta say, they’re a fashion statement and those Empire State Heels sure do rock the outfits.

Diane Lunsford

I am a writer. I remember the first time I said those words out loud, I had to say them a few more times before the concept stuck. That was over 25 years ago and I still begin most days tasking myself to write something—anything as long as I keep paying the words forward. Humor plays an important role in my writing because a true writer needs a great sense of humor and some really thick skin. I can’t even imagine the fall out each time that proverbial thanks, but no thanks comes in the mail—okay, email nowadays if I didn't have humor. I’m one of five children, smack-dab in the middle of my siblings and had a set of parents who did a great job of raising our herd. I'm a wife with a great husband and mom with two amazing daughters. Words matter and when they’re strategically placed to command laughter due to their precise placement, what a symphony! I’m never going to stop writing and laughing. I’ll see you on the other side some day. I’ll be the one with the red balloon; standing at the end of the…wearing a…

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