Have been feverishly trying to get your teen to zero in on a few colleges? Does his selection criteria border on ridiculous? Below is Excerpt 2 from my book College Bound and Gagged: How To Help Your Kid Get Into A Great College Without Losing Your Savings, Your Relationship, or Your Mind.
In the ideal world, your teen comes up with a list of eight potential colleges. You veto one for price, one for party reputation, and one for distance. (Because even if you could afford it, an airline ticket with three connections isn’t prudent.) You’re left with five; you visit three or four, and you’re done. Sounds pretty simple unless your child is the strong, silent type. Trying to get an early list of colleges out of my younger son was like chatting with a mime. Twenty questions later, we were no closer to pinning him down on any campus possibilities. Talking to other parents in the same boat of indecision, it became clear this is a common phenomenon. Not only is the reluctant college list maker relatively silent, when he does speak, his selection criteria borders on ridiculous. Here’s a verbatim transcript from my life….
Me: What about Texas?
Teen: I don’t think I can go anywhere where they speak with Southern accents.
Me: But you have a Pittsburgh accent; this really isn’t the place to start throwing stones.
Me (after deep breath): How about Ohio? There are so many great schools in Ohio.
Teen: I’m not going anywhere that borders our state.
Me (rough calculations look like he’s eliminated five additional states and Ontario; I am determined to figure this out): And why is that?
Teen: It just doesn’t feel right.
Conversation closed and no closer to creating a list.
Your student is supposed to drive the process, but if he won’t kick into gear, it’s hard to find a starting point. Before you throw in the towel and assume you’ll never get that extra guest room, read College Bound and Gagged and learn discover how to nudge your applicant forward.
Your student is supposed to drive the process, but if he won’t kick into gear, it’s hard to find a starting point. Before you throw in the towel and assume you’ll never get that extra guest room, read College Bound and Gagged to discover how to nudge your applicant forward.
Nancy Berk, Ph.D. is the author of COLLEGE BOUND AND GAGGED: How to Help Your Kid Get Into a Great College Without Losing Your Savings, Your Relationship, or Your Mind. A blogger for The Huffington Post, USA Today College, and MORE Magazine, Nancy’s been spotlighted in The New York Times and interviewed by The Wall Street Journal, CNN, and MSN. She has appeared on television and radio, and hosts three podcasts: Whine At 9, The College-Bound Chronicles (with Lian Dolan) and The College Mom Minute.
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Tags: college, College Admissions, College Bound and Gagged, Dr. Nancy Berk, Humor Outcasts, parents, teens
Hi Nancy, this is a topic near and dear to my heart…this is my second time around with this college deal, and you have totally hit the nail on the head. In one blog post I wrote, I compared the process to finding a bride! He should have all his applications in in a few weeks, and then we wait and see.