According to the mother of Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte, her son has time for only one-night stands with the ladies. I love when mothers and sons share such personal information with each other and then let the public know. I think we should all pause here and recognize the fact that there is very little between Ryan Lochte’s Speedo and the rest of the world, and before any woman consents to taking a dip in his pool, she should make sure he dons a protective cap on all the appropriate heads.
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After reading what Lochte’s mom said about him, every time I see him now, I think “herpes”