NEWS HEADLINE: Presidents Koch Bros to Allow Only Billionaires to Vote!

Folks, if you want to vote, you better pull yourself up by the bootstraps, work hard and save!

It appears that today the filthy hippies and Marxists have their lovebeads in a lather at the fringe-right corporate mouthpieces/unwanted court justices and their decision regarding the Voting Rights Act.

I’ve been reading that Justice Roberts did not want to damage his “legacy” by siding with the loonies and their judicial activism, or want to be known as the guy in charge of the SCOTUS that took it upon themselves to appoint themselves to Congress and start legislating from the bench. I didn’t think he wanted to be the guy to make some boneheaded decision on behalf of Koch Bro who in turn uses a front group to rile up scared old people and convince them to actually send money for the purpose of taking away their badly needed Social Security and Medicare. Alas, that is the whole point of conservative politics — constant insane fear-mongering about “the other” so that the stressed-out and beaten-down white working class will continue voting in small numbers, and when they do vote they’ll lean just enough on the side of corporate anti-government politics and against their own interests, again.

And they are so very, very scared of Barack Obama’s hold on non-whites and young folks (and by “young” I mean prescooter), with their books and iPhones and ethnic food and rudimentary understanding of government. There’s a real danger that these people — the majority of American voters — will not suddenly support some fat white right-wing racist like Newt Gingrich or Haley Barbour or whatever kochsucker the GOP shoves up on the podium. Silly kids, silly misinformed minorities, insisting that a political party have actual candidates they would be willing to vote for. Where do they gets these crazy notions? That jungle music they listen to? The Youtubes? Does Maru have power over them? The best idea they can come up with is not produce a candidate that the youngs and minorities might be willing to support, or to lobby in favor of policies that the youngs and minorities might agree with, nooooo, it’s to cold prevent them from voting at all.

Dear Justice Scalia,

We would like to have nice things again. So fuck the fuck off. Thanks and have a nice day.

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2 thoughts on “NEWS HEADLINE: Presidents Koch Bros to Allow Only Billionaires to Vote!”

  1. Hilarious as usual Kara

    I don’t think we ever need to fear a Koch Bro presidency. They already have enough power by buying off just the right number of legislators to produce legislation that protects their special interests.

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