Unicorn Bites 12/31/13
3-year-old: Daddy, don’t dance while you drive. Me: Fine. When should I dance? 3: Never. She’s a prodigy at being ashamed of me. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 31, 2013 Our 1-year-old has […]
Lately, the news has been full of stories about “automatic cars.” Supposedly, these are the cars of the not so distant future. Basically, they will be able to drive themselves, freeing us […]
I’m starting to wonder if I’m a reincarnation of Benjamin Franklin or maybe Thomas Edison, because I keep coming up with awesome inventions. My latest one will surely appeal to outdoorsmen who wish to keep […]
WE ALL DO it. Every New Year we look back and resolve to correct our bad habits and mend our ways. That new exercise regime lasts all of a week, and the withdrawal symptoms […]
I couldn’t think what the special occasion was. It wasn’t a birthday, Friday or the anniversary of argument number 72 but she still let me know in no uncertain terms that I was a pathetic, […]
My New Year’s resolution is to make everyone else break theirs. If you need me, I’ll be in front of the gym passing out doughnuts. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 30, 2013 Hot […]
I’ve been analyzing Downton Abbey for quite sometime now, so this season I thought, instead of just sitting back and enjoying it, I’d offer up a few suggestions in the plot department. Elizabeth McGovern and […]
It’s that time of year when we do the one thing we should never do, which is to look back and assess the previous year. But if we’re gonna insist on driving down that mud-clogged […]
In my ongoing quest to try to discover what my massive problem is, I’ve hit a brick wall and it hurts. Although I don’t have any formal qualifications from the man, I like to think […]
Women are hard to read. The same polite smile can mean “I’m happy” or “I’m going to hit you with my car.” — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 29, 2013 My wife and kids […]