Unicorn Bites 3/7/14

If your boyfriend says he’d catch a grenade for you, don’t be flattered. Clearly he’d rather die than stay in that relationship. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 7, 2014 Me: *splashes warm water on face* […]

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Unicorn Bites 12/31/13

3-year-old: Daddy, don’t dance while you drive. Me: Fine. When should I dance? 3: Never. She’s a prodigy at being ashamed of me. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 31, 2013 Our 1-year-old has […]

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Unicorn Bites 9/19/13

I’ve watched “Aladdin” like 25 times with my kids, so I know quite a bit about politics in the Middle East. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 19, 2013   Coworker: “I’m a Vikings […]

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