Posts Tagged ‘ parenting ’

“You Kids Have It So Easy!” (Parental Lecture, Year 2038 Edition)

March 20, 2018
By

Growing up, I routinely was on the receiving end of my dad’s lectures about how cushy my life was compared to his when he was a youth. “You have no idea how easy you have…

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Dad’s got a ticket to ride

March 16, 2018
By

I heard the best time to go to Disneyland is Super Bowl Sunday. That’s because no one goes on the unofficial national holiday, when even churches are closed. According to the Nielsen Company (a global…

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Memo to our kids: The family has decided to downsize

January 18, 2018
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[Author’s note: The following is a memo I plan to send my two daughters upon their college graduations, informing them that they are now officially responsible for their own lives – and phone bills.] MEMO…

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Stacey Roberts is Back: Meet Trailer Trash With A Girl’s Name: Father Figures

October 27, 2017
By

His long awaited sequel to Trailer Trash with a Girl’s Name (TTWGN) has finally arrived. We at HO are so proud of this funny, poignant writer and his new book Trailer Trash with a Girl’s…

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Things My Father Taught Me

October 10, 2017
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My father was an extraordinary man. He was an attorney who won 99% of his cases. He played piano like a virtuoso even though he couldn’t read a note of music. He was extremely well-read.…

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Someday My Demon Son Shall Give Unto Me A Demon Grandson

September 21, 2017
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Does anyone know a good exorcist? My son is the spawn of the devil. I first discovered this years ago playing a game called, “Scattergories” with another family. This game, if you are not familiar,…

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Random Bits from the ‘burbs

September 15, 2017
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GOOD REASON—There’s a perfectly good explanation for the garage band down the street. I’m told someone will make up the explanation later. FREE COUCH—My 6-year-old son and I were on a walk to the park…

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Happy ending to dog’s tale

July 1, 2017
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Our pet beagle eats his food fast—really fast. I wondered if we should do something about it. So my wife told a friend, the friend told another friend who was a veterinarian, and the veterinarian…

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Wife says ‘You two are better than U2!’

June 9, 2017
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I’ve been married almost 17 years, and I know that my wife is not materialistic. For Christmas, Valentine’s Day, anniversaries and birthdays, she doesn’t want much. She’s more into the thought and love behind a…

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Being Italian means eating tomatoes and loving it

May 5, 2017
By

I’ve known this for years about my son, who’s now 13, but the other day something hit me, and I didn’t like it. I had to bring it up. Me: You’re my kid. You’re Italian.…

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