Here’s one that’s long past its expiry date.
“You can take it to the bank.”
This means that you can depend on the truthfulness of a statement; that what you’re being told is not bogus.
When was the last time you could associate the word “truthfulness” with “bank” and keep a straight face? Truth is the UFO of the banking world; seldom sighted and usually dismissed.
Come to think of it, when was the last time you wanted to take something to a bank? Have you walked into one lately? The world “morgue” comes to mind, and not just because they are deathly quiet. There’s this feeling that you are about to be sold a coffin for your money. Once you’re there, handing something over to these guys is risky. The chances are it will disappear into a pile of yellowing home foreclosure documents, or be repackaged as a complex, securitized bundle of toxic investing claptrap and sold back to you.
Let’s dump this idiom or change it. Here are a few suggestions.
You can take it to the bank (wink, wink)
You can take it to the bank (if you don’t want to see it again)
You can take it to the bank (and hopefully just lose your shirt)
Watch this space for more Idiotic Idioms.