Unmarried South Carolina Lindsey Graham, despite non-existent polling numbers, remains confident in his ability to secure the GOP Presidential nomination and capture the White House. On ABC’s “The View” he explained to Whoopi Goldberg that “I’ve got the other gentlemen and lady right where I want them. I’ve always been known to come from behind.” He would be the first bachelor President since Grover Cleveland.
“Can you image…Living in that big old White House? That will certainly be a boon to my prospects. I mean, who is going to turn down an invitation to go back to the White House for a nightcap? Though I will have to do something about the decor. It’s truly dreadful at the moment. But remember President James Buchanan? He had himself a wingman who even lived there in the White House with him. Senator King. I heard they’d be up late at all hours, hammering out strategies, and those ladies never could pin either of them down. He remained free to play the field until the day he died. That’s how my Presidency will play out. No lady will be locking this wild cat up, let me tell you. I do all right for myself as it is, but the White House…Shoo Eeee! If that White House is a rockin’, don’t come a knockin’!”
Graham further explained that if there’s a pink tie on the doorknob, the state of the union is “busy.”