Report: Lamar Odom Awakens, Asks If He Got All Of Sex Acts He Paid For

LAS VEGAS — A close family source reported that Lamar Odom is conscious and breathing on his own in a Las Vegas hospital and has even spoken a few words, mostly questions about whether he got all of the sex acts he paid for before losing consciousness.

“Seventy five thousand bucks is a lot of dough, man. I’m pretty sure I didn’t get seventy five thousand bucks worth of sex before I started discharging bodily fluids from my eyes and mouth, you know? I know I’m a basketball player and I’ve made millions of dollars, but a guy’s still gotta be frugal about these types of things. I was thinking that 75 Gs was at least gonna last me a few days.”

Odom has been hospitalized since Tuesday, when he was found unconscious at a well-known Nevada brothel, 90 minutes from Las Vegas. He was rushed to the hospital and put on life support. He now wears a breathing mask, which is not quite enough to muffle his incessant questions about the brothel’s return policy.

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