Stroke The Paint Brush, Stroke The Ego

portrait

Somewhere in Washington, D.C. you can find an official painting of Michael B. Donley. You’ll definitely want to add seeing that to your vacation itinerary the next time you visit the nation’s capital.

Wait, who?

Mr Donley was an Air Force Secretary and, according to the Washington Times, his portrait cost taxpayers $41,200. That’s actually not bad when you consider that the one of me hanging above my fireplace cost $62,300. But still. Apparently, government agencies commission artists to paint portraits of cabinet secretaries and other top appointees. It’s not just the Presidents and VPs who get painted.

I should’ve gone to art school and studied painting.

Agencies do put the projects out for bid and accept the lowest bidder. Which means that someone with almost no skill should out-bid everyone else and paint a really crappy portrait. Imagine unveiling a portrait of a former CIA director that looks just like Edvard Munch’s The Scream.

The head of the Taxpayers Protection Alliance put it succinctly when he said “It’s not like people are going to be lining up for an exhibit titled ‘HUD Secretaries Through The Years’.” Well, that’s because the display of those portraits is boring. These portraits could become a big tourist attraction, if you made viewing them fun. Here’s what you do:

You gather all the portraits into one building. Below each portrait you hang a plaque stating what the person accomplished and what they moved on to after leaving government. It’d look like this:

Plaque

plaque2

If you build it people will come. Especially if they get to laugh at ego-stroking.

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6 thoughts on “Stroke The Paint Brush, Stroke The Ego”

  1. Love your apt name for the Treasury Secretary.

    Why not photos printed on canvas? 11″ X 14″ for $29.99 at Walgreen’s or a 16″ X 24″ FRAMED canvas print for $139 from Canvas Pop.

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