The renovation and rebranding of the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts in Washington, DC will be completed by the middle of 2026, the White House announced on Sunday.
“The Trump/Kennedy Center Casino and Dog Track is going to be so, so great,” said President Donald J. Trump. “Don’t let the radical left fool you. The surest route to upward mobility is not a college degree; it’s a $25 wager at the roulette wheel or a $50 bet on a canine named Silver Bullet. What beautiful dogs those greyhounds are! So very, very beautiful. They’re slim, they’re laser-focused, and they never smile — just like my Melania.
“Those gorgeous creatures will be racing around the track seven days a week, chasing a bobblehead of Nancy Pelosi covered with Alpo. You know, they run almost as fast as the First Lady does when I’m trying to catch up with her in the Lincoln Bedroom so we can have the sex.
“The days of using the Center to honor opera singers and harpists that nobody has ever heard of are OVER!”